


Welcome to the Mindscape

by Devekinz



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Abuse, F/F, Gets really mind fucky, M/M, Magic, Manipulation, Pacifica x Mabel hinted at, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Tentacles, Very triggering so please be warned, Violent, Weridmaggedon has a slightly different story to it, You Have Been Warned, other characters are included but they aren't important/ don't stay long, sexsexsex, trans!Dipper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-01 00:18:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 18
Words: 31,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10910424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Devekinz/pseuds/Devekinz
Summary: When Dipper’s lie about his past comes back, what is he left to do? Run. When addiction takes over, but moral dilemma keeps you in a loop, how do you escape? Give in.Dipper told some of his closest friends (and teacher) the tall tale of how Weirdmaggedon began and the malicious tricks of Bill Cipher, but was that all true?





	1. The Return

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go, buckle up kiddos, because this is going to be one hell of a ride. Sorry about these beginning chapters being short, they will get longer, I promise.

I was sitting in class, no one but my teacher and my friend occupied the room with me. I began to stuff my bag back up with my binder, notebooks, and pencils, the clock on my phone stared back at me blankly with the numbers 5:30 p.m. 

“What are the plans for the next meeting Mr. Perry?” I asked the teacher currently putting boxes of books back into a wooden cabinet. “Well, we might doing another one of those activities the group suggested. Make sure everyone is on the same track though.” His voice waved in and out as he stuck his head in and out of the cabinet placing the boxes in their respective places. 

The student that was to my right was just about to leave, slinging their bag over a shoulder, but they stopped. A familiar yet chilling voice spoke from the front of the room, wrapping around my neck, it seemed, as I choked for air, twisting my head around to stare right into the eye of my nightmares. Bill Cipher, dream demon, all seeing and all knowing, ruler of the nightmare realm, DO NOT SUMMON AT ALL COSTS. The words in my head played like a broken record, bringing me back to the years I spent in Gravity Falls, Oregon. 

“Yellow, Pine Tree!” his all too enthusiastic voice pierced my ears, sending chills down my spine. I grimaced at the sight of him,  _ what could he possibly want _ . “Dipper, who the  _ fuck _ is that?!” The terrified kid was wide eyed and shaking, but looked at me as if I was to blame since that yellow eyed Demon seemed to know me too well, and that was something I regretted deeply.

“Why, i’m Bill Cipher! Pine Tree and I go way back.” If he had a mouth he would be smirking like no other. “Get out of here Bill, I have no business with you anymore!” I shouted at him, though I couldn’t recall ever doing so as my body was still in shock. “Now, would you really want me to do that?” Bill was poking fun at me, he knew what he was doing, and I hated it. 

“Actually he would, right Dipper?” That kid seemed all too confident with his response, crossing his arms and raising his chin. I was lost for words at this point, scared, upset, so many question yet so many curses I wanted to yell in his dumb triangle face. “Kid, you don’t know anything, stay out of this.” Bill warned him, narrowing his slowly darkening eye, but it perked back up as soon as he turned his attention to me. “Why... Why are you back?” I asked in a soft voice. 

It had been, what, nearly 5 years since the incident. I wish he would just disappear like he did all those years ago. “Well, I missed my favorite human of course! I loved all the times we spent in the mindscape, but it wasn’t very nice of you to try and kill me.” He had a hint of anger at that last part, he must have been holding a grudge, but that scared me even more. 

“Dipper, what is he talking about?” Mr. Perry finally spoke up for once, being completely silent up until now. “It’s nothing, I told you everything before, he’s just tricking us.” I tried to sound as believable as I could, knowing I was lying. “Now, now, Pine Tree. It’s not nice to lie.” He ‘tsked’ me with one of his black fingers, turning around as he projected an image. 

It was filled with billions of stars, galaxies, and colorful nebulas. He began to look down at the ground of a never before seen planet, two people were sitting next to each other. I couldn’t believe my eyes as it sent sparks through my nerves, tears began to collect in my eyes. It was Bill and I, sitting there talking about anything and everything, there was no limits to our conversations as he was all knowing, but in our place, he liked to change into a human form to make me more comfortable. His striking platinum blonde hair and crystal blue eye complimented his structured face, those pale pink lips I couldn’t ever forget. He was intimidating, yet charming and enticing all at once. 

Mr. Perry and the kid seemed horrified as they couldn’t take their eyes away from the scene unfolding. “Dipper…” Mr. Perry was solemn, yet disappointed all at once, he slowly turned to look at me with sad puppy dog eyes. 

Thankfully, they couldn’t hear what the conversation was in Bill’s projection, but it was already bad enough to see us being friendly. The image began to move like a short video, Bill and I talking, then an arm swoop around me and a soft kiss was placed against my temple, a clear smile came from me. The tears in my eyes didn’t stop falling, i was gasping for air as I sobbed. The repressed memories I tried so hard to hide away flashed past my eyes, starting out innocent, but quickly delved into the darker memories of Bill and I’s relationship, if you could even call it that. One moment I saw Bill in his triangle form, the next he’s a dark mass with red glowing eyes, but it was all in my head, i’m insane aren’t I? I had to get out of there, I couldn’t stand it. 

I ran out of there, never looking back, my bag already on my back as I dashed through the school blindly through tear filled eyes. Bill’s voice seemed to echo from somewhere behind me, yet I couldn’t locate it. I heard the voices of the kid and Mr. Perry from somewhere behind me, begging and pleading for me to come back, but I didn’t listen. I bursted through the side doors near the cafeteria, the brisk air grazed my hot skin. My breathing was rigid, lungs burning, but I was so scared that I couldn’t care less. I kept peering over my shoulder to see if he was following, but I never saw him, but I also didn’t see the rock on the ground either as I tipped over it. I fell to the ground with a loud thud, head first. The last thing I remembered was how bright everything was then suddenly it all went black.

∆ ∆ ∆

_ I sat up quickly, scanning the area with wild eyes trying to figure out if I was still on the ground by the school, but all I saw was a void of nothingness surrounding me. Oh no, I must be in the mindscape. I hadn’t been here in years, not even in my dreams as I was too scared to come back to the one place Bill had total control of. Even though the mindscape is Bill’s realm, he still taught me a few things that may come to his disadvantage if he comes here. I slowly rose to my feet, then tried to come up with a plan.  _

_ I began to walk around to try and find something, anything. I tried to remember some old spells Bill attempted to teach me, but it had been so long. God, think Dipper,  think . Wait, what was that? I quickly turned around to find the source of the sound. Nothing. Then I heard the sound again, it sounded a lot like… laughter. No, he couldn’t be here,  no no no .  _

_ I ran again, I don’t know where, I just bolted. I was quickly stopped by Bill’s triangular form appearing in front of me. “Where do you think you’re going Pine Tree?” His tone was sadistic, what did he even want from me. I was lost for words, like my mouth was filled with cotton. “What... What do you want from me? Haven’t you ruined my life enough?” My voice came out shaky and squeaky, my knees were wobbling as if I was about to collapse. “I want  you , haven’t I made that obvious?” Bill knew exactly what he was doing, but I was left guessing and assuming, he is so cryptic. He slowly floated closer to me, but simultaneously poofed into the form I knew all too well, the form that took a lot from me.  _

_ I fell backwards with a squeak, and huddled over covering my head and ears with my arms. I didn’t realize was whispering “no” over and over again like a chant. I wanted to scream, I wanted to run, but where to? I was alone with that one eyed freak. I could feel Bill bending over in front of me, then a gentle hand slithered under my chin and slowly lifted my head up to meet those eyes. Those gold eyes that seemed to stare deep into my soul, yet I couldn’t even read them as anything else but  hungry .  _

_ I hadn’t I noticed I was crying until Bill wiped away a tear that had fallen down my cheek. He was so close to my face, it made me cringe yet, feel so at home and I hated it. He steadily rose to his feet, towering over my cowering body, and gave a subtle smirk. “Gosh Pine Tree, you act like i’m some kind of  monster .” the irony stang the air, letting an awkward silence fill the space between us.  _

_ “Okay, okay I am a monster, but i’m not the Devil.” Bill sometimes made me want to jump off a cliff. Who am I kidding, he  always makes me wanna jump off a cliff. “Have I ever not protected you?” Okay he had a point there, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t hurt me. I remained silent, not giving him the satisfaction he wanted. “Come on Pine Tree, talk to me.” Silence. “Look, i’m sorry for whatever I did to hurt your feelings, can you please forgive me?” Forgive him? Is he kidding me!? How could I ever forgive him for the pain he caused me. Okay, this isn’t making any sense, wake up,  wake up . Why was he back? After last time, how was he keeping his cool? He must want something, but  what ? Bill grimaced at my lack of response, “Fine, don’t talk, whatever. You’ll talk eventually.” _

And just like that I woke up in a panicked sweat. My eyes darted around to see that I was laying in the comfort of my bed, in my room. Okay, so how the  _ hell _ did I end up here?


	2. Flashback

I went to grab my phone that seemed to magically be sitting on my dresser next to the bed. 7 messages, 10 missed calls, 2 emails. Great. I swiped my phone open to see I had worried messages and calls from my mother and father, wait what time was it? I looked to the top of my phone to see it was 12:06 a.m. So technically yesterday, I left my parents in a panicked frenzy, so how did I end up here? I went to the emails I had, both from Mr. Perry. 

(message 1)  _ Hey Dipper, I just wanted to make sure you were alright, we found you lying unconscious in the grass. The paramedics said you would be fine, just a minor concussion, but whatever we just saw will stay between us. Not like anyone would believe us anyways, but I hope nothing else bad happens. Just know we’re here for you. _

(message 2)  _ You’re probably still out cold, but I can’t shake off the feeling that that demon thing might come back. I’ve been researching ever since I came home and found some old demon warding sigils, which I highly recommend you try out and put in your room, etc. P.S. I’ll put them in my room too in case he decides to pop up in school, i’m here for you. _

I couldn’t believe what I just read. My teacher, helping me out with something most people wouldn’t even be able to grasp? He certainly is the best teacher ever, no doubt. But that still doesn’t help with  _ why _ Bill came back. I clicked on the images Mr. Perry attached with the email, I guess it’s time to start drawing.

∆ ∆ ∆

_“Who are you?!” I shrieked at the one eyed yellow demon floating before me. “The names Bill Cipher!” He stuck our one of his ink black arms to shake hands, but I only back up more. “What do you want from me?” I was shaking, knuckles turning white as I held journal 3 close to my chest._

_ “Whatever you want Pine Tree, I have knowledge from all over the universe, I see all and know all.” That did sound tempting, me being the adventurous, knowledge hungry kid I was. “Just let me in your mind kid, we can learn so much together, I can show you things no other human could even imagine.” His eye seemed to smile at me, as his mouth was non-existent.  _

_ His outstretched hand was engulfed in cyan blue flames, but emitted no heat. This felt like a deal you couldn’t beat, just let this guy into my mind to learn any and all things of the universe, heck yeah! I cautiously stuck out my tiny hand, not feeling the flames even though I could clearly see them wrap around me. Bill let out a small chuckle, that then slowly grew into loud laughter, then to obnoxious cackling that echoed around me, it kept getting louder and louder until, nothing. What did I just do? _

I shook my head, memories of how I was dumb enough to let that demon in clogged my vision as I was drawing sigils into my wooden floors with a piece of white chalk. As I added the finishing touches, I slid my rug back over the spot to hide the drawing and set the chalk on my desk. I rubbed my eyes, yawning, then stared blankly at the time, 12:57 a.m. 

I flopped onto my bed, realizing how bad of an idea that was as pain shot through my head on impact. I gripped tightly into my hair and curled up, moaning in pain, waiting for it to suside. I wanted nothing more than to sleep forever, yet even that thought scared me as I knew there could be a chance of Bill getting me. Sleep overcame me, and the last thing I remembered was the bit of moonlight shining through my window. 

∆ ∆ ∆

_ You don’t have to ask me twice, if you play anything 80’s or rocked related, I’m on it like bees to honey. I was walking to a nearby gas station, the summer sun beating down on me. I had my headphones in, leisurely walking down the sidewalk with the song Tommy Gun by Royal Republic playing.  _

_ I had been talking to Bill for a good month now, I guess you could call us friends. We would most of the time just talk about random things, or he would show me all kinds of cool places; in the mindscape that is. Bill told me that the mindscape was the one place he could stay with me without anyone looking at me weird. He would stay there a lot, but sometimes he would leave for ‘business reasons’. But in there, he would talk to me, and I could talk back in my mind, so no one could hear us. The mindscape was also a place Bill could teach me things, and was how he showed me such cool places. Recently, he’s been trying to teach me some basic Latin spells, although, i’m not very good at speaking Latin.  _

_ I was enjoying the nature around me, the trees swaying in the light breeze, the birds that would fly over head, then the chorus of the song hit. “And if I had a final wish, pretty miss, I would only ask this…”  I could sense Bill somewhere in my mind, though he mostly stayed quiet and listened to the music with me. “I want you to do me with a tommy-gun baby, With a tommy-gun baby, do me. Gun-tommy”  _

_ Suddenly, Bill spoke out, “Mmm, sounds like a good idea Pine Tree~” he cooed. The next thing I know, i’m in the mindscape with Bill. “Bill! You can’t just do that! Someone is going to pick me up from along the road.” I whined furiously. “Fine, fine, give me a second.” Bill’s eyes closed, and it stayed closed for a good minute before he opened it up again. “There, I moved your body.” My eyes were wide with shock. “You what?!”  _

_ “I possessed your body for just a minute so I could move you from the sidewalk.” Bill grinned down at me, seeming pretty content with what he did, though I wasn’t having it. “Bill, i’m still outside!” My face felt hot, I knew I was probably bright red. “It’s okay Pine Tree, you’re out of sight. I put you behind those trees.” Bill gave such an innocent grin like he saw nothing wrong with this. “Fine, whatever.” I huffed. “Why did you bring me here anyways?” Bill stared blankly, then began to smirk smugly.  _

_ “I thought those lyrics were pretty interesting.” Seriously? All because he liked the lyrics to my song? “Bill, why would you bring me here over that? You could have just said it-” Bill cut me off with a soft, gentle kiss. This wasn’t the first time he had done it, he liked to be touchy feely. Like cuddle, hold hands, that sort of thing, but the kiss still caught me off guard and made me blush furiously. Though we both knew it, but I would never admit it, Bill was my first kiss. He was my first everything. I would be lying if I said I felt things for him, but it wouldn’t if I said I thought he felt the same. I should have known demons only “feel” under the rule of the seven deadly sins, yet I was stupid enough to call lust, love.  _

Hot. That was the first thing I thought of when I sprung up from my bed. I threw my sheets as far as possible, and slipped my drenched shirt off too. It was obviously morning from the bright sunlight that assaulted my eyes, making me squint around my room. 

I managed to look at my alarm clock next to my bed, 1:12 p.m. Oh man, did they really let me sleep in this late?! It shouldn’t be a surprise to me considering I do have a concussion, but still. I shivered at the memory of the dream, or more so the recollection of a past memory. 

I swung one leg over the mattress, then the other, slowly rising to my feet. I groggily drug myself to the bathroom, turing on a cold shower to wash away the sweat from last night's episode. I discarded the rest of my clothes, which was just my boxers and socks, then glanced in the mirror. 

My glance turned into a gaze as the scars from years ago stood out. White, jagged lines littered my arms and legs. I hate myself. But apparently not enough to just kill myself and end my suffering.  _ Coward _ . I stepped into the icy shower, the water instantly soothing my burning skin.


	3. I Don't Need You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kinda explict, heads up!

Mabel was always concerned for me after the… Incident. She never knew full details, I could never openly admit to them, but what she did know was that Bill hurt me, us. Everytime she saw that look in my eyes, that hurt that seeped out through my tears, she didn’t say anything. Just hugged me tightly and pet my messy hair for reassurance that it was over, but now it’s not. I didn’t want Mabel to know that Bill was back, she didn’t deserve to have that kind of stress again, I already put her through enough. One little secret won’t hurt.

After my shower, I walked downstairs to see my family, all huddled around the table eating lunch, no doubt talking about me. “Oh good, you're up.” My mom said with tired eyes and a weary smile. I plopped into an open seat, hanging my head. I may have slept a lot, but it sure didn’t feel like it.

A plate was slid over to me with a sandwich on it, I slowly looked up to my sister who forced a smile, even though I knew she was concerned. I gave her a weak smile and slowly took the sandwich into my hands, beginning to eat it. I didn’t realize how hungry I was until I took the first bite of the sandwich, and at that point I scarfed it down.

“How are you feeling, son?” My dad latched a soft hand on top of mine. “I’m feeling, okay. Kinda tired though.” My mother jumped up from her seat and walked into the kitchen, then came back with a glass of water and some pills. She placed the glass in front of me and handed the pills. “This should help your head.” I took the pills and water, and thanked her.

∆ ∆ ∆

Later that day, I was laying in my bed, trying to come up with a plan of action, though thinking too hard made my head pound. I had pulled out journal 3 and the journal I had created long ago, blowing dust off of them as I hadn’t touched them in years.

After Wierdmaggedon, adventure slowly slipped away from me, it reminded me too much of what had happened. I only continued my adventures for two years after it, but couldn't go on with the random flashbacks and panic attacks I would receive while in the forest.

I looked through the notes I had jotted down on Bill, and the pages that Ford wrote too, trying to figure out anything to help me. Just then, Mabel walked in. I slammed the books closed and shoved them under my blanket as she crept in slowly.

“Hey, bro bro.” Her voice was quiet. She closed the door behind her then walked over to the bean bag I had on my floor, pulling it close to my bed. “Look Mabel, i’m fine. I’m sure i’ll be good as new by Monday-” she cut me off. “Dipper, I know something is up.” Fuck. “I’m your twin, I know a thing or two about you, and something isn’t adding up. Why were you running? Who were you running from?” I was afraid Mabel would ask questions, yet I knew they were coming.

“I wasn’t running at all, where did you hear that from?” I began to fidget with my hands. “Dipper, don’t treat me like i’m stupid, I could hear the paramedics and what that teacher was saying.” I remained silent, to afraid to tell Mabel the truth. “Dipper, is there something wrong?” Mabel was seemingly growing more and more worried at my lack of response.

Just then, her phone began to buzz, playing some pop tune I didn’t recognize. “We’ll talk about this later.” Mabel picked up the phone and walked out of my room. _Man_ , that was close.

I grabbed my journals from under the blanket and turned back to my original pages. Suddenly, I remembered the old spells Bill taught me, not what they were but _where_ they were. I shoved the books off of me and stumbled over to my closet, sifting through the mess of closed and old boxes. I finally managed to find the small shoe box, filled with little notes of the spells Bill taught me.

The box look completely normal except that I had drawn a small triangle in the bottom left corner to differentiate it from the other junk that littered my closet. Maybe some of these spells could help me against Bill. I scanned through them, finding a basic fire spell, _ignis,_ which the only hard part was concentrating all my energy into it. Okay, this was a start, but I needed something more, like a warding spell or something, but Bill wasn’t dumb enough to teach me spells that could harm him. I kept searching the box, but there wasn’t much else, the rest were to help me against monsters. Then, I stumbled upon a particular note, _you’re my little Pine Tree~._ I wanted to gag, but somewhere in me I knew it was overcompensation.

I shoved all the papers back into the box and placed it far into my closet. What the hell am I going to do? I lazily strolled over to bed, plopping down on my back, letting out a shaky sigh at the thoughts that threatened to emerge. I tried to push them down, but couldn’t. Before I knew it, I was engulfed in dark memories, my only response being the occasional cringe as I curled into a tight ball.

_Bill did a lot of random things, never having any motives other than just because he can. Looking back at it I think that was a bullshit excuse most times, but whatever. Bill had kissed me plenty of times, to the point I could almost say I was use to the feeling of his lips against mine. I always lectured Bill about sending me to the mindscape in the middle of public places, especially school, but he didn’t seem to understand._

_It was the last month of school before summer came and I could say hello to Gravity Falls once again. I was sitting in class, mindlessly listening to the teacher talk about notes for whatever subject we were doing, I wasn’t really paying attention. Bill, of course, sitting in my mind. He took note of my lack of focus, and before I could comprehend what was happening, all I saw was black, then there was Bill._

_“Bill! What the heck!” Bill had that big grin he always wore plaster on his face. “What? I was bored, and by the looks of it you were too.” I couldn’t deny that, but I was still fearful of someone trying to wake me up or the teacher calling on me._

_“Bill, as much as I would love to stay, I can’t, you know that. What would happen if someone saw me unconscious?” He gave me those puppy dog eyes, the ones paired with a quivering lip and slight whine. I couldn’t say no. “Bill, seriously! Here, how about we hang out after school? Once I get home we can come back here for as long as you want.” Bill perked up at that and brought me into a bone crushing hug. “Deal.”_

_I was engulfed in blue flames for a split second as he kissed me, then I woke up suddenly. I glanced around, some people around me giving me strange looks. I scanned the room for the wall clock, there was 5 minutes left of this class. ‘See? Perfect timing Pine Tree.’ Bill said from inside my mind. I mentally grumbled at him._

_∆ ∆ ∆_

_I had just gotten home, Mabel by my side, as we walked into the kitchen to say hello to our parents. I took to my room leaving everyone behind, making sure to lock my door so Mabel wouldn’t barge in. I could feel Bill’s anxiousness, as I set my stuff down and took my shoes off. I crawled into my bed with an exhausted groan, shutting my eyes, then found myself in the mindscape._

_Okay Bill, what do you wanna do?” Bill had a smirk on his face, “You~” I pushed  his shoulder back and yelled in protest at his joke, it was a joke right? “Gross Bill, but seriously.” “Whatever you wanna do.” Bill began floating lazily, eyes glued onto me. “Hmm. I don’t really know.” I didn’t like the silence, so I had music begin to play inside my head. The song that came on was Tommy Gun, which seemed to catch Bills attention._

_“Ya know…” Bill came closer to me, “I could make you feel amazing, just say the word.” he was whispering in my ear, sending shivers down my spine. I wasn’t dumb, I was pretty sure I knew what he meant, but being me, I still wanted to be sure. “What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked in a shy voice, face beat red. “You got the right idea in mind~” Oh yeah, I forgot he could read my mind. I had to admit, I wasn’t sure if I could follow through with it. I had never done anything with anyone, I had only kissed Bill, that was it._

_Part of me was extremely uncomfortable, the other side of me was curious, curious to know what it felt like. “O-Okay.” I said shakily through my messy hair in an attempt to hide my flustered face. Bill’s expression seemed to change through different emotions so quickly, first he lit up with excitement, then determination, then something along the lines of animalistic and lustful._

_He closed the space between us, lifting my head up with a hand and kissing me passionately. His lips were soft, though he kissed me roughly, his tongue making it’s way into my mouth. The heat between us only grew, but Bill took care of that as he took off my shirt, along with his, trying not to break the kiss as we both grew needy._

_We ended up on the floor, but I couldn’t feel it, our bodies seemed to grind in rhythm with one another. My mind was a jumbled mess, before I could comprehend it, Bill was pulling my pants off, leaving me completely exposed. Breaking the intense kiss, Bill took a moment to study my body like a work of art, he seemed pleased as he hummed lowly at the sight, and dipped down again to kiss me, but didn’t stop there. He kissed my cheek, then my jaw, my neck, my collar bone, leading down to my hip bones and growing erection. Bill paused, looking up at me with innocent yet hungry eyes, slowly moving his head closer and closer, till I could feel his hot breath on my cock._

_His mouth wrapped around my throbbing head, I couldn’t help but let out a small whimper as my hips slightly buckled under him. He sucked lightly, tracing the head with his tongue, then dipped his head down, taking me entirely. I gasp in sharply, a load moan escaping my slightly chapped lips, my back arching at the euphoria shooting through my veins. Bill’s head bobbed up and down, growing in speed, my mind was reduced to mush with the only thing that I could focus on was Bill’s mouth on me._

_My toes curled, hips buck, stomach tightened as I felt myself about to cum, I couldn’t hold back. Bill didn’t stop, he kept going all the way through my ecstasy, my body trembled under his touch as grasped onto my hips to keep me still. He lifted his head up with one last suck, leaving me to shiver on the floor and regain consciousness of my surroundings._

_I slowly sat up, body humming with heat and slightly tingling, “That, was amazing.” I said with shallow breaths. Bill seemed pretty pleased with himself, staring down at me with confidence and pride, “You’re welcome~” he winked._

I hadn’t noticed how much time passed, but looking at the clock told me I was lost in thought for a good 10 minutes. I shuddered at the long forgotten memories, they made me feel dull and hollow inside. I resided to my desk, bringing the books along with me to help focus on the task at hand, getting rid of Bill.


	4. Packing

My research wasn’t very successful, nothing but same old information I already knew, and sadly nothing seemed to click in my head either. My head was feeling a lot better than before, but it still felt like a knife through my head at points. Aspirin seemed to be my best friend this weekend. I paced my room trying to come up with a game plan, something Bill wouldn’t think of first. My phone went off at exactly noon, I almost forgot what it was for until I looked at the screen displaying a banner with the words “Take T!” written across it. I always seemed to forget that I have to actually put effort into being myself. I had been on shots for about half a year now, originally I was put on gel, as I was too young for the hormone shots. That sadly didn’t completely stop the growth in my chest.

I walked over to my dresser, pulling out my vial of testosterone and the sterile needle kept in a package. I was meticulous with my movements, making sure I didn’t mess up a single thing as I pulled the needle out of the plastic bag, and unscrewed the cap of the tiny bottle. I grabbed some alcohol wipes to clean the needle, making sure every square inch was cleaned. I slowly stuck the needle into the vial, and took got of the liquid, making sure it raised up to the correct tick, put pushed some out to make sure there wasn’t any air. I held onto the needle tightly, and placed the vial aside, then pulled up my boxer’s up to reveal my bare thigh. With a steady hand, I began to stick the needle into my skin, making sure I was hitting muscle, then squeezed the hormone into my body. 

This process was something I had been familiar with for a while now, but I hated it all at the same time. It made me feel artificial, yet I knew these were necessary steps to being who I was meant to be. No one had to know except me. Those people on the streets saw nothing but a teenage boy, strangers at school saw me as another hormonal boy, no one knew. Granted, my family and close friends who have known for forever knew, but that didn’t make them see me differently or change anything. I was still Dipper Pines to them, more formally, Mason Pines. Maybe that’s why I loved the mindscape so much. I was able to be me without all the artificial add-ons. There was no hopes of a successful surgery one day or hormones I had to take monthly, no breath taking binders; it was like I had never been cursed with that life at all.

_ The first time I was in the mindscape, I learned just what it was. It was my mind, the holder of every memory I kept, it was my thoughts, my dreams. With it, you held the power to do and become anything you imagined. Bill taught me so much about the mindscape, and taught me even more while we were in it. The one thing that always blew my mind was that here, I could be me, the real me, the me I wished I could have been born as. It had become such a usual occurrence, every time I found myself in the mindscape I was no longer strained from the constriction of a binder, no more pretending what was under my jeans. I became the Dipper Pines I hoped and dreamed of being. It’s almost sad to say that I was happier in my head than in real life, but this was just one small thing.  _

_ Bill could teach me so much without the need to leave my house. He took me to far away galaxies just to show me how beautiful the stars were from whatever planet we were visiting. He told me stories from the trillions upon trillions of years of his existence. I learned more from Bill than I ever did in school.  _

_ One day, he introduced me to the arts of magic, which no doubt intrigued me, but is a lot harder than it seems. I first had to be taught some basic latin, learning the tongue and pronunciation of it all. I was taught how to focus my energy, mostly through meditation. I even practiced outside the mindscape, which was definitely harder, but with Bill by my side I could accomplish anything.  _

_ I couldn’t keep this a secret, I had to show Mabel all the cool things I had been learning. I had one day dragged her to my room at the Mystery Shack to show her a few spells. “Look, Mabel!... Ignis.” a bright flame appeared in my outstretched hand, causing Mabel to exclaim in surprise. “Oh my gosh, Dipper! How did you learn this?” I couldn’t let her know that i had help from a demon, so maybe I didn’t tell her everything.  _

_ “I did some research and taught myself.” I put on a show with my chest out and prideful grin to act as if I had really done this on my own. I knew what I was doing had to be somehow wrong, the journals even said so, but I was just so curious, and Bill didn’t seem so destructive. I mean yeah he’s a demon and may be a bit morbid at moments, but he never showed intentions of world domination. How wrong I was…  _

Sometimes I wish I hadn’t been dumb enough to summon Bill, this was all my fault. So naive, so ignorant, so knowledge hungry. All of this was so  _ stupid! _ I gripped my hair tightly, huddling over in aggravation and frustration. I abruptly stood up from my bed and paced angrily around my room. All these flashbacks, these stupid scars, all these  _ feelings _ are eating me alive. Even with all this anger, I feared for what would happen tomorrow. What if Bill came to me during class, or while I was walking home? I know Mr. Perry’s room was a safe place for me, but I can’t hide out in there for long. If Bill got to me, I don’t know what would happen. Would he torture me? No, he didn’t hurt me last time, he said he  _ wanted _ me. What the hell did he want with me? To hell if he actually felt something for me. This isn’t making any sense to me, and  _ i’m _ the smart one here. 

Mabel suddenly walked into my room, making extra sure she shut the door, then glared at me seriously. “Time to fess up bro bro.” “Mabel, I told you everything is fine.” “Dipper, you can’t keep doing this!” The room fell silent, the tension overtaking the area. “If I didn’t know any better I would think this has to do with Bill.” I froze in place, paralyzed with fear. Mabel noticed my strange expression immediately. “Oh no, Dipper. Don’t tell me…” she trailed off, embracing me in a large hug. “Just tell me what’s going on.” She looked at me with concerned eyes, I hated those eyes. “It’s just…” I didn’t know whether I should lie again or just come clean, but no matter what, my impulse took control. 

“I keep having flashbacks, I had a bit of an episode at the school, and freaked out.” Okay, half lie. “Dipper…” She held me even tighter than before. We stayed like that for a while, not moving, not talking, just sitting there in eachothers arms. Thinking about it, I don’t know what telling Mabel would do. She couldn’t do anything to stop or help it, and getting help wouldn’t make things any better. What did Mabel hope to accomplish out of this? 

“Mabel, I don’t see the point in telling you this. That’s why I didn’t want to say anything.” Mabel pulled back from me, “Since you told me, I now know what to do. Just know that if that ever happens again ,tell me. We can get through this together.” She gave me a reassuring look, placing a gentle hand on my shoulder. “I’m glad we could have this talk.” Mabel got up from my bed to leave my room, “Oh, and one more thing.” I looked at Mabel confused, “This can stay between us, I won’t tell Grunkle Stan and Ford unless you want to.” I was relieved to hear that, the last thing I wanted was Ford catching on.


	5. Get Out of My Head

Bright and early Monday morning, the daily routine to get ready for school made me groan in protest. I was never much of an early bird, yet I never slept at all. I crawled out of bed and began my routine to eat, shower, brush my teeth, get dressed, then leave with Mabel. As I emerged for my room fully dressed and prepared to leave, Mabel was standing there waiting for me. We walked down the stairs and said our goodbyes as we walked out into the brisk morning air.

I bit on my lower lip, body tense as I feared the possibility of Bill showing up again. I was vulnerable out here. Mabel was rambling on about some crazy dream she had last night, but I couldn’t focus with this fear coursing through my veins. My mind was on high alert. My eyes darted everywhere, from the sky, to the spaces between houses, to the trees, everything. As we approached the school, I didn’t know whether I should be relieved or more nervous at the even scarier possibilities, if Bill were to get to me here.

∆ ∆ ∆

I somehow managed to make it the whole week without a single sign of Bill, this must mean he’s laying low, planning his next attack when I least expect it. Well, jokes on him if he think’s I’m letting my guard down. It is time I really get my A game on and study up on everything about Bill, all the way to those spells. I’m going to need them.

“ _ Ignis.” _ , this was what seemed like the 40th time I attempted this simple spell, yet all I could muster up was a slight spark. I began to grow more and more frustrated with each try. I jumped up from my bed, grabbing a jacket and my phone, and stormed out of my room. “I’m going to take a walk.” I said dully as I left the house without waiting for a response. 

There was a slight breeze, stirring up some debri that was in the road. It startled me at first, but I mentally slapped myself for being so jumpy. I ran all the way to a nearby park, knowing no one would be there at this time of night. It was surrounded by some trees, right in the middle of my neighborhood, soft grass blades swayed in the wind along with leaves that bloomed on the trees. There were houses all around, but most people couldn’t see much through the oaks. I climbed up onto one of the platforms of the park, sitting crisscrossed. I sat there, letting the calamity of the wind sooth my agitation, I took in a slow, deep breath. 

I was there silently for a good 5 minutes before I let the word roll of my tongue, “ _ Ignis _ .” My hand became engulfed in bright flames, illuminating my surroundings in the dark night. Just like that, the flame was gone. A smirk came over my face at my sense of accomplishment, but now was the time to practice some other spells. 

I wasn't so sure about the next one, as it was already gusty outside, but I would give it a try anyways. I sat up and walked over to the swing set. They were already swinging in a slow rhythm.” _ Ventus.” _  I sent the swing flying in the opposite direction. 

Okay, we seem to be getting somewhere, the feeling of energy surged through my body. It was familiar, yet unfamiliar from how long it’s been since I last used this kind of power. I kept practicing, even mixing the wind and fire spell, practicing on controlling my energy. 

I wanted to take things a step further, I concentrated on a tree that was about 30 feet away, keeping the image in my head with immense concentration. “ _ Ianuae. _ ” In the blink of an eye, I was teleported right next to the tree. I was really getting the hang of this now. I began running back towards the park, and right when I stepped up on the plastic lining, jumping off it, I simultaneously shouted, “ _ Levis gravitate! _ ”. I was in the air, maybe 10 feet up, everything seemed slow motion as I landed on one of the open platforms. 

I peered over at my phone sitting on the opposite platform, focusing on it, “ _ Levis gravitate. _ ” I mumbled, sending the phone right over to me. I looked at the time, realizing I had been here for over an hour. I guess I should go home now. I smirked at the fun idea that popped into my head. “ _ Ianuae.” _ I was right at my front door, taking the cool handle into my hand as I walked into what seemed like an empty house. 

The lights were off, which led me to assume everyone had gone to bed. I locked the door behind me, trudging up the stairs. Practicing those spells sure did drain the energy out of me. I walked into my room, slipping off my shoes and clothes, then plopped into bed. I didn’t realize just how tired I was until my head hit the pillow, sending me straight into a deep slumber.

∆ ∆ ∆

_“¥ØÜ ÇÅÑT RÜÑ.” The voice was booming and disoriented. I could hear my breath in my ears, quick and raspy. My chest burned along with my legs. I peered over my shoulder, the monster following me was Bill Cipher, but he was much larger, eyes, teeth, tentacles all over him. He looked horrific. I tried to run faster, but legs wouldn't budge. I felt hot breath down my neck, slime dripped into my hair and on my clothes. A slimy tentacle grabbed onto my right leg and pulled back, sending me face first into the hard ground. The taste of iron filled my mouth, causing me to cough. Bill pinned me down, coming close to my face, the smell was something between hot blood and decaying flesh. My face contorted in disgust, but he only came closer. His voice echoed all around me, “Į GØT ¥ØÜ ÑØW.” He chuckled lowly, but it grew louder and louder. I felt like my ear would bleed. _

Suddenly sat up, a breathy scream escaping my chapped lips. I clutched my chest, body shivering in a cold sweat. I frantically looked around the dark room, still taking uneven breathes out of fear. “On-only a dream.” I reminded myself, trying to take in a calm breath. 

I swung my legs over the bed, getting up to go to the bathroom. I flipped the switch, the bright light causing me to squint. My hands gripped the sparkling white porcelain counter for support, sleep still leaving me disoriented. I glared up at my reflection, asking myself why I was this way. 

Turning on cold water,  I splashed my face with the cool liquid. I grabbed a face towel that was hanging on a nearby rack. Looking back at my reflection once more, I frowned, leaving the bathroom to retreat back into my room. 

I looked around once more at the darkness around me, I had never feared the dark, but in this moment, I fear the possibility of someone, or something, lurking in it despite my best efforts to keep them out.

∆ ∆ ∆

3 weeks, and I still never saw Bill, though I stayed on edge throughout all that time. I almost wanted to give up, thinking maybe Bill just dropped in to mess with my head. No. The minute I let my guard down, Bill will swoop in. I’m not sure I can’t keep this up though, Mabel was already growing concerned with how fidgety and jumpy I was. I’m almost to the point of just giving up on everything, I don’t want to keep fighting, sometimes I wish I could just forget. 

I was laying in my bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. All these options ran through my head. Maybe if I kill myself I won’t see Bill again… But what if I do see him, what if I’m with him forever?! The possibilities could go on and on, I didn’t want to think about this anymore. I’m tired of everything. I broke out of my staring contest with the ceiling, choosing to roll over and look at the wall instead. The weight of everything came crashing down, hot tears filled eyes and rolled down my cheeks. I hiccuped at the tightness in my chest and throat, I couldn’t stop the sobbing sounds. I felt so out of control. I stayed curled up, a bawling mess, until I fell into a restless slumber.


	6. What is Normal?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning, explicit!
> 
> I'll add some more chapters tomorrow, but I hope y'all enjoy the story! (again sorry they're so short, they will get longer!)

_I didn’t know where I was, everything was complete and utter darkness. Panic began to settle in as I began running aimlessly. No, I can’t be here, I had to get out. Wake up . Somewhere from behind me I heard something, like a rushing wind, causing me to quickly turn to the source. Nothing. I heard it again but from somewhere to my right. Soon the noise seemed to surround me, I feel onto my knees in fear, hiding behind my arms and legs. A familiar demonic voice spoke from in front of me._

_“Hello, Pine Tree~” even in this dark tone, I could tell he was cooing to me. Shivers ran down my spine, the hairs on my neck stood up as I froze in place. I was completely paralyzed, unable to speak, react, or anything. I felt large slimy tentacles wrap around my trembling limbs, raising my body up into an upright position. “Don’t think that i’m going to let you off easy this time.” He said in a low growl. His triangle form was red, surrounded in furious flames and terrifying appendages. Before I could scream, a tentacle forced it’s way into my mouth, making me gag and cry. Tears prickled the corners of my eyes, but soon consumed my vision entirely. Everything was a blur of darkness and bright flames, Bill’s laughter echoed around me._

_Somehow I magically wasn’t wearing clothes anymore, the heat of the flames and coolness of the slime danced across my skin. I let out a muffled whimper at another tentacle wrapping around my flaccid member, stroking it in a fast pace. I couldn’t keep my eyes open, they closed shut out of fear and overstimulation. My body was on fire, everything tingled, my toes curled, my body was stiffening all over. My mind screamed stop, but I couldn't expel those words, all I could do was cry and hope this would end soon._

_My thoughts were cut off at another cool tentacle slipping into my tight ass. A muffled scream escaped my vocal cords, never making it out of my throat. My eyes shot wide open, pain surged through my body. I was a sobbing mess, gagging, trembling, my body fell limp at my climax. I felt disgusting, violated. I fell to the ground once the appendages let go of me, I was gasping for my breath back, slowly staring up at Bill who seemed pleased with himself. “What’ll it be Pine Tree?” I didn’t understand what he wanted, all I could do was continue coughing and crying._

_“Give in.” “There’s no escape!” those words swarmed around me in Bill’s intimidating voice. They rang like a never ending chant, overlapping and growing louder. I covered my ears, bent over in agony, then let out a bloodcurdling scream. Even I didn’t know what I was saying, all I knew was I screeched to the top of my lungs. Shouting for it all to stop, for it all to end, for him to go away._

I woke up with a stir, my blankets fell to the floor. _Only a dream, only a dream_ . I kept trying to remind myself, but the tears still forced their way out my tear ducts. I softly whimpered into my knees, I hated this, _all_ of this.

I wearily crawled out of my bed, deciding to get a cold glass of water to calm my raw throat; I must have been screaming. I quietly made my way down the creaky stairs and into the kitchen, grabbing a water bottle out of the fridge. I sat at the table trying to catch my breath in between sips. I didn’t want to go back to sleep, I was afraid of the dreams that might return, so instead I decided to read the journals, maybe writing down more notes if needed.

∆ ∆ ∆

It was coming close to the end of the year, and for once I feared going to Gravity Falls. What if Bill got to me on the way up there? What if Great Uncle Ford noticed my strange behavior? Too many possibilities cluttered my head, I didn’t want to deal with this anymore. I gripped my hair in frustration, letting out low growls. I felt like I was going insane.

Just last week, I freaked out thinking I saw Bill outside a window of one of my classes. I had ran straight out of the class, anxiety corsed through my veins. My breath quickened, chest tightened, eyes wild. I hid under the stairs until security found me and sent me to the counselor. This was getting out of hand, maybe confronting Bill would help me instead, would it? Maybe i’ve gone completely mad, but that idea began to seem logical. Face my fear, take him on, and possibly get answers. Yeah, that didn’t sound too bad.

I grabbed my journal, some candles, and my pocket knife. I scratched at the sigil on the floor to break it, then set up the candles. I read out the summoning spell, anticipating Bill’s arrival. The last word rolled off my tongue, the room instantly grayscaled, and with it, Bill’s triangular form appeared in front of me out of blue flames.

His booming voice was cackling all around me, then suddenly stopped when he fully appeared. “Well, well, well, Pine Tree! Have you finally given up?” I didn’t waste a moment, “ _Ignis_.” My arms were engulfed in flames. Bill’s eye widened, but then narrowed down at me. “Tsk, tsk. You shouldn’t do that Pine Tree.”

I was suddenly restrained by blue shackles, nothing I said or did freed me from them. “Now, we are going to talk like civilized humans. . . and Demon.” I was screwed, completely and utterly screwed. “Let me go, Bill!” I spat at him. “Not a chance, sapling. You’ll just try to attack me.” He was right, but that doesn’t mean I liked it.

“Now, what do you want.” What did I want? To be let go and for him to leave me alone forever! “Nothing you can give me, just let me go.” I growled. “Oh, Pine Tree, don’t act like you don’t want anything. I can give you knowledge, power, anything! Just make a-” “A deal, yeah yeah, I know your game Cipher.” I had a crazy, terrible idea in mind, but maybe it was just crazy enough to make me happy again. I saw Bill turn, floating away.

“Well, if you’re just going to waste my-” “Wait!” I cut him off, though it was kind of in a dilemma at this point. “There is one thing you can do for me. . .” Bill stopped dead in his tracks. “And what would that be?” I hesitated, but my mouth seemed to go on autopilot, “Make me forget.” The words came out soft and timid, I almost couldn’t believe that I had just said it. “Forget what exactly?” Bill was intrigued now, turning around to come face to face with me.

“Forget that I ever met you, all the times we shared, all of it.” Bill’s eye widened in surprise. “So, what do you want in exchange, my soul, eternal torture, my organs?” Bill was taken aback, “Pine Tree, I wouldn’t hurt you for one, and two I don’t want anything.” Wait. . . Did Bill Cipher really just say- “Yes, I don’t want anything in return.” Okay, what is his game? There’s got to be a catch to this somehow. Before I had time to question, Bill was already gone. “ _I’m in your head_ .” His voice made me jump. “ _See ya around~_ ” I couldn’t even say anything before I was suddenly awoken by seemingly nothing.

My head was throbbing, like a drum was thumping in my head. I rubbed my temples as I rose out of bed. I couldn’t remember what I had just been doing, though, it felt like I had been doing something. . .

“Hey bro bro!” My sister barged into my room like she always seemed to do. “Did you just wake up?” I guess I did, but even I wasn’t completely sure of that either. “Uh, yeah.” I rubbed my forehead once again at the agonizing pain I felt. “Is something wrong, Dipper?” My sister rushed over to my side, placing a gentle arm around me.

“Yeah, yeah i’m fine, just a really bad headache.” I winced at a sudden sharp pain from behind my eyes. “Or maybe a migraine.” Mabel rubbed soothing circles along my back, “Here, I’ll go get you some aspirin and water.” Mabel left my room, leaving me alone to ponder more on what exactly is happening.

I felt like I’m forgetting something, something _big_ , but it just didn’t come to mind. Maybe I’ll remember it later at some point or another. “Here you go Dippin’ sauce, I’ll leave you be, just holler if you need anything.” Mabel had been treating me a lot nicer lately, but why? I couldn’t figure it out, there was some reason but it wouldn’t click. This only made my head hurt even more, maybe I shouldn’t think too hard about this. I took a swig of my water and downed two pills.

∆ ∆ ∆

The moment I’d been waiting for was finally here! I was all packed up and ready to go to Gravity Falls, a wide grin plastered on my face. “I can’t wait to get back to the Mystery Shack! I wonder how everyone is doing too!” I was ecstatic to visit my favorite place in the whole wide world, but something about this felt almost foreign. . . Like I hadn’t been happy in a while, but why? I guess I just really hadn’t done much this school year to make me this happy. Nothing really came to mind that stood out as _exciting_.

Mabel was by my side, sparkling suitcases packed too, as we waiting at the bus station. “I can’t wait to see Waddles, I always miss him so much when we’re gone!” Mable was holding a photo she had taken of Waddles and her back in the summer, then she shoved it into a sleeve of her suitcase. A loud bus pulled up to our station with the words “Gravity Falls” in the same bold letters we’ve seen for 5 years. We boarded, taking a seat all the way in the back like we always did. I couldn’t wait to see everyone again, explore the forest, go to my favorite diner, have my favorite room in the whole world, and the best part, no school work. I could spend the whole time exploring, reading, and writing all I want. I wondered what Great Uncle Ford was working on now, maybe I could help him when I wasn’t working the Shack or exploring. I let my head rest on the warm glass, watching cars and trees go by, eventually sending me to sleep.


	7. Home

I was bouncing with excitement at the evergreen pine tree’s passing by, the winding road that led us to the Mystery Shack was in sight. Mabel was squealing with excitement next to me as we grew closer and closer to our stop. I could see the sparkling falls glistening in the late morning sun, I always love sitting in that field by the river. Our bus came to a slow stop, our Grunkles, Soos, Melody, and Wendy waiting for us. Mabel and I snatched our bags and dashed off the bus, jumping into giant hugs with our family and friends. 

“Dipper, Mabel!” Everyone beamed with excitement, “We missed you guys so much!” Mabel said pulling away from her hug with wendy. Waddles jumped out from behind Grunkle Stan, snorting and running over to Mabel. “Waddles!” She let the pig jump into her arms.

Everyone began to walk back to the Shack in one large group, making conversations of how everyone had been since their last parting. Mabel and I ran inside, enjoying the smell of outdoors and pancakes in the air, and the familiar creak of the old wooden floors. I marched up the stairs to my room, while Mabel went down the hall. We hadn’t shared a room in years, which felt weird at first, but it was kind of nice to be alone. 

I opened my squeaky door, walking into my cluttered mess. Photos messy covered a wall above my desk, papers littered the the desk itself, books scattered everywhere. Just the way I left it. I let my bags fall, taking particular happiness in hopping on my bed. I sat up slowly, scanning my room once more. It felt like home being here, even more than my own home! This is where I belonged. I climbed out of bed to open up the triangle stained window. . . but something stopped me. 

My hand paused in an out reached position, something about the window was all too familiar, not because I’ve seen it for years, but as if there was some other kind of connection with it. I decided that maybe it was nothing, just a little deja vu, and brushed off that thought, opening the window. The fresh forest air was one of my favorite smells. 

“Dipper!” I heard Mabels voice call for me from down stairs. I quickly shut the window and, emerged from my room to see Mabel waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs, “Don’t hide out in your room just yet, bro bro! Come visit with the family.” I followed her into the living room, today the shop was closed, so everyone got to sit around for hours on end and tell stories of how their year had been.

∆ ∆ ∆ 

Ah, the sweet feeling a relaxation. I stretched, rolling onto my side, letting my body sink into the old mattress and throwing the covers over half my body. My eyes studied the wall in front of me, every groove, crack, and bump was my version of counting sheep. My eyes soon began to flutter shut halfway through my examination, eventually leading to my much needed rest.

_ I was walking through the forest, just like any other time I would when visiting Gravity Falls, but this time, I felt like I was being watched. Something was lurking, though, I never saw anything. What could be out here? I kept wandering the forest, the foliage only growing thicker and thicker, sunlight slowly vanishing. I thought that maybe I should turn back, but I couldn’t, my body didn’t seem to let me.  _

_ Further and further, I kept venturing into the unknown, but I wasn’t afraid. Questions rather than fear ran through my mind. I had traveled so far, I was practically in pitch black darkness, no longer seeing outlines of tall pine trees. My body kept walking, as if on autopilot, before stopping in front of a door. Just a lonesome, wooden door. I wanted to open the door, no doubt about it, but something stopped me.  _

_ My body refused to cooperate with me. I heard a low, squeaky creak coming from the door. It was opening! My eyes widened in anticipation, my mind was racing at what could be behind the door. There was a bright white light being emitted from the room, when the door was fully open, I had to shield my eyes from the blinding sight. In almost an instant, it was gone. I stared through the door to find it was just my room. All that just to see my room! I stomped into the room, fuming with how stupid this was, but then I froze. I noticed the window had a slight glow around the edges. What did this mean? I was about to reach and open the window, just fingertips away. . . _

My eyes shot open, I took in a harsh gasp and how suddenly things changed, not sure of where I was for a moment. I was staring straight up at my ceiling .  I quickly sat up and flipped over to look up at my window. It was exactly the way I had left it from last night. No glowing light. Nothing. I rubbed the sleep from eyes, staring at the time on the little digital clock, 10:34 a.m. I guess I should get out of bed. After a much needed shower and change of clothes, I trotted down the stairs and into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast. 

Ford was down there, reading a newspaper with a cup of coffee sitting in front of him. “Morning, Dipper.” Ford seemed to be in a good mood at his cheerful tone. “Morning, Ford. How’s your morning?” I replied, groggily grabbing a bowl and a box of cereal. “It’s been good, I see you just woke up?” I yawned, only proving his statement more. I let out a light chuckle, “Guilty as charged.” I pour the cereal and milk into the bowl, and take a seat across from Ford. 

“So, anything new on the agenda of weird?” I ask, taking a large bite of my food. Ford choked a bit, but I didn’t understand why. He coughed quickly and cleared his throat, “Well, recently things have been pretty sound, though that’s susceptible to change.” I was kind of bummed that there was no new and exciting mysteries to uncover, but maybe in the future there will be, so I couldn’t be  _ too _ upset. “Man, that sucks.” Ford groaned into his coffee mug in agreeance, but gave me a weird look. 

Suddenly, Mabel appeared in the walkway, already dressed and ready for whatever today brought her. “Hey bro bro, I see you finally woke up.” she nudged me as she walked by, going straight to the fridge. She grabbed a bottle of water, “I’m going to head out with pacifica into town~” she sang out as she walked out the front door without waiting for a response. Ford hadn’t even flinched, but I knew he duly noted her whereabouts. “What are your plans for the day, Dipper?” I swallowed the food that was in my mouth, “Probably hang around here, maybe go to the woods, nothing much.” I said in a nonchalant tone. 

I took one last bite of my cereal, and got up to place it in the sink, then brushed past Ford to retreated back into my room. Going into the woods didn’t sound like a bad idea either, so I decided to start packing a bag for a mini adventure into the forest. I grabbed the journal, and my own notebook, because you never know what you’ll come across in Gravity Falls. I made sure to place my pocket knife into my left pocket, phone in my right pocket. I then grabbed a flashlight, batteries, a wireless phone charger, some rope, and Mabel’s grappling hook. I had come to learn that with all the beings that roamed the forest, being prepared for the unexpected was essential. 

One time, Mabel and I were on a little adventure to find forest nymph, but things took an unexpected turn and we ended up running into an abandoned house that was inhabited by what seemed to be foxes. I know, foxes, but don’t be fooled. They weren’t your ordinary everyday foxes, they were what’s known as,  _ The Vulpes _ . They are tricksters with multiple tails, and very hard to kill; so in that moment, running was our only option. After getting home from that trip, I decided to do some research and ask Ford about them, to which he said their weakness was their tales. Their tails are their life source, so cutting them off would essentially kill them, if you could even manage to do so.

With my bag packed, I made my way back down stairs to grab some snack bars and water from the kitchen. Ford wasn’t sitting at the table anymore, so I figured he was off somewhere with Grunkle Stan or maybe in his room. I walked into the gift shop to find Wendy sitting on her stool, reading some magazine with her legs propped up on the counter. 

“Hey Wendy, have you seen Ford or Stan around?” She didn’t move a muscle, still keeping her face stuffed in the magazine, “Uh, yeah. I think Stan is in his office.” I thanked her, waved to Soos, and went past the curtain to follow the dim hallway to Stan’s office. 

Wendy still only worked part time at the Shack, but when she wasn’t she worked with her family in the logging industry. She wasn’t one for school, so she decided to start full time working right after graduation. Though, the Mystery Shack was like a second home to her, she didn’t seem to want to let it go, so she decided to stay here, which I’m glad for.

Soos had been running the Shack while our Grunkles went on paranormal trips out of state, starting at the end of our first summer. Although Soos took over, Grunkle Stan still helped out in miniscule ways, usual when it came down to finances. Other than that, he let Soos run the shop, who seemed to really enjoy the job.

His door was cracked, I could hear two gruff voices talking lowly to one another. “What do you mean he could be back?” “Well, when I checked the statue, it was crumbled to pieces!” “What if it was just some dumb kid who stumbled upon it?” “I don’t know Stanley, but something just doesn’t feel right. . .” I had no clue what they were talking about, what statue were they talking about? Maybe that could be something i look for in the forest. I decided to take this brief moment of pause as my cue to knock. “Hey guys, I just wanted to let you know I’m going to head out into the forest for a bit.” I waited for a response, which seemed hesitant. “Okay, be safe.” I heard Ford say, though it seemed a bit forced. I walked away, pondering on the conversation I had just heard. This meant that maybe Ford was lying to me, Stan said someone, or something is back, but who? Ford seemed to be investigating it, so what about it lead him to keep this secret from me? I was stumped, but maybe if I found that statue I could get somewhere with this. 

The leaves of bushes and trees around me swayed lightly in the breeze, but also provided shade and coolness in contrast to the hot summer sun. I missed the familiar sounds and smells of the Gravity Falls forest. I took a swig of water while continuing my journey deeper into the forest. If I were a mysterious statue hidden in the forest, where would I be? I tried searching for memorable landmarks that may lead me to it, but I was finding no luck. Maybe I took their conversation out of context? No. There was no denying what they said. 

After my entire day’s of an adventure, I concluded to finding nothing more than a few normal woodland creatures. I was disappointed to not solving this mystery, but there is a whole summer ahead of me, so I can’t get too down about it. I walked back into the Shack, cover in dirt and sweat from today’s events. I reeked of outdoors, which sent me to a trip straight to the shower. Standing under the warm water and watching the dirt slide down the drain was satisfying, but I couldn’t shake off the feeling of being watched. I had no reason to feel that way, the bathroom door was locked, but the feeling wouldn’t go away. I decided that my mind was only playing tricks on me and tried my best to ignore the itching sensation of eyes boring into my back.

∆ ∆ ∆

“Hey bro bro! How was your day?” Mabel gleamed, as she sat across from me at the dinner table. “It was fine, just the usual forest exploration, how was your date with Pacifica?” I questioned her with eyebrows raised, sending my clear intentions her way. Her face grew a bright shade of pink, “It wasn’t a date!” she sputtered out, avoiding me knowing eyes. “Okay, whatever you say,  _ lover girl _ ~” she punched my arm in protest, which actually kind of hurt. I rubbed the spot where Mabel had hit me, though, still giggling at my sister’s denial. 

“Wait, so you went on an exploration? You haven’t done that in a while, what were you looking for?” Mabel’s question caught me off guard. Looking back, I  _ had _ stopped the explorations, but I couldn’t come up with a reason why. “I wasn’t looking for anything in particular, just exploring.” I didn’t know why I didn’t tell her, it just felt like I shouldn’t… Not yet at least.


	8. The Eyes Are Everywhere

After that moment in the bathroom, it always felt like I was being watched. Most days I would jokingly call out my sister's name, thinking she was spying on me, though I would never find her near me. In fact, no one would be near me in those moments. There was no explanation to this phenomena and for once, I, Dipper Pines, could not solve this mystery.

My first week here in Gravity Falls is slowly living up to my expectations as my search for the statue continued. The thrill of adventure and mystery made me giddy like a child on Christmas. My own journal is slowly becoming filled up with all the theories and entries about this case, I am determined to figure this out. I decided that since this person, or thing, is something Ford is familiar with, maybe his journal had something about it.

I grabbed Journal 3 and began to read it, page after page, beginning to end. I had passed the middle of the book, when a strange page caught my attention. A black sketch of a triangular being was on the page, titled  _ Bill Cipher _ . That’s weird, surely I would remember this page, but I couldn’t recall ever seeing this page before. Big bold letters were written across the page DO NOT SUMMON AT ALL COSTS. I read further, coming to find out this thi-… Bill was a dream demon, and by the looks of it, him and Ford did not have a good relationship. There were a few notes off to the side in my handwriting, but when had I put those there? I didn’t find much, other than “Can beat him in the mindscape.” and, “Cipher wheel is his weakness.” 

There were more pages after this one, growing darker and darker, as if Ford was losing his sanity. Scribbles of black and red pen swarmed the pages with millions of eyes sketched on the pages. The name, Bill Cipher, it seemed familiar, yet I had never seen nor heard of this dream demon. I’ve read this book a thousand times over, so why am I now just seeing this? My head spun with confusion and thought, my mind couldn’t come to a conclusion. I shut the book suddenly and set it aside. I need to clear my throbbing head.

∆ ∆ ∆

It was early afternoon, the birds chirped from up in the trees, other land creatures could be heard scurrying around the brush. The sweet smell of pine put me at ease from my scattered thoughts. I took in a deep breath of the fresh air, letting peace take over. I loved the scenery of the nature before me; the fresh water river babbling by, the soft blades of grass dancing in the wind, all was calm. 

I chuckled a bit at the thought of something actually being ‘calm’ and soothing in this crazy town of weirdness. Laying here under the sun felt nice, the grass was smooth and the temperature was nice today. It was a bit hot with the sun beating down on me from the clear sky, but I didn’t mind. I allowed my eyes to close, and before I knew it, I drifted off into an unintentional slumber.

_ It didn’t feel like time passed at all, but I shot up from my spot on the ground worriedly. Just as I was about to evaluate my surrounds for the time, but something else about it caught my attention. Everything was devoid of color, nothing but grey tones for miles around. There was no sun, nor a moon here. It wasn’t bright like the afternoon, though it wasn’t nighttime either. It was just dull. I began to freak out, unsure of where I was and how I had gotten here. Suddenly, I remembered that I had fallen asleep, so maybe this was just some crazy dream, a really realistic dream.  _

_ I climbed onto my feet, leaving my bag of things behind as I didn’t care for them, this is a dream after all. I took cautious steps around the area, scoping out for anything; any animals, any people, just something. I decided I might as well find my way back to the shack, so I took on the journey back home. As I wandered, I grew more and more uneasy at how still everything seemed. There was no sense of time and the breeze I had felt was no longer existent. The forest was also deprived of any sound, the creatures seemed to not occupy the trees anymore. It was a complete ghost town. The further I walked, the creepier it got. Even though I saw no signs of life, it still felt like I was being watched. I tentatively looked around as my stroll in the woods turned into a hurried walk, eager to find the Shack.  _

_ I reached the edge of the woods, finding the Mystery Shack finally. I let out a shaky breath of relief at the comforting sight. Hugging myself tightly, as I was afraid of what could be lurking around, I took slow steps up to the front door. My hand hovered over the old knob, but I decided what’s the worst that could happen. The door let out a loud creak, making me jump at the sudden noise in a silent world. I let it open all the way and stepped inside. I’m not exactly sure what I’m doing, or hoping to accomplish, I was just aimless following a path I knew well, the only one I knew. Home gave me a sense of security, so maybe I’m just looking for the safety of the Shack in this bland world.  _

_ Everything seemed to be in place, maybe cleaner than it was in actuality, but it was still the same house I had grown to know and love. Maybe my room has something for me, I thought to myself, deciding to take the stairs up to my room. As expected, some of the steps creaked quietly beneath my feet, just like the real Shack. My door was there, a light spilling through the cracks, something seemed familiar about this… My dream!  _

_ I barged into the room, stopping at the glowing window in front of me. I reached up to open the window, wasting no time, afraid I would wake up before ever figuring out what was behind the stained glass. The glass was cool, much cooler than the air around me, my fingers lightly pushed the window, letting it swing open slowly. The light flooded my eyes, forcing me to cover them with my arm. I took a step, trying to squint at the light to get a glimpse of what was there. The light seemed to come towards me before dieing out to nothing, but in it’s place stood… a triangle? Okay, I’ve had some crazy dreams but this is just too weird. Something about it seemed familiar too.  _

_ A terrifying wide eye rolled from somewhere behind the being, a top hat, appendages, and cane appeared in an instant. “Yellow!” A cheerful, unworldly voice yelled from all around me, making me stumble back onto my butt. The triangle moved towards me, and suddenly I was hit with who this was. “Y-you’re Bill.” The words came out quiety and airy, I couldn’t believe my eyes. A dream demon, right here, I was scared out of my mind. “The one and only!” he made exaggerated movements with his black cane. Something about him was too… happy? Demons are usually scary and power hungry, but Bill didn’t come off that way, maybe demented but not totally evil. “I see you’ve read about me, it’s a shame sixer wrote such awful things about me.” The nickname caught me off guard, but I realized he meant Ford.  _

_ “You’re a demon, why aren’t you trying to kill me, or feed me to monstrous babies, or torture me for eternity?!” The demon seemed taken aback by my question and accusations. “Pine Tree, I’m hurt! You act like I’m some horrible- okay maybe I am, but not to you!” To me? What was so special about me? “Wha-what do y-you mean-n? Why are you calling me Pine Tree?” My body was shaking all over. Anxiety wrapped around my throat and brought tears to my eyes. I couldn’t understand what I had done. I hadn’t summoned him, and I hadn’t done anything to provoke him, did I?  _

_ “I mean, I like you kid! You intrigue me, I want you!” I didn’t like the sound of that. “And I call you Pine Tree because of your hat! Human names are so boring.” he rolled his one eye. I wanted nothing more than to leave, yet I am so curious to figure out what exactly Bill wants. “How about I propose a deal?” Okay, that definitely didn’t sound good. “N-no.” Bill lost his happy expression. “You haven’t even heard it yet!” he whined. I remained silent, I felt as though I had no choice other than to hear his proposal.  _

_ “All I ask for is a small price. Allow me to bind with your mind, body, and soul.” I couldn’t help the fear that soon erupted from me. “What!!” I shot up and tried to run, but Bill soon appeared in front of me. “Don’t just run away.” Bill seemed angered at my attempt to escape, but he soon pushed it down and let out a frustrated groan. “Look, let me do that, and I’ll protect you from everything, no one or anything can hurt you.” He couldn’t be serious. I wasn’t going to just let him take total control of me in exchange for protection!  _

_ I’ve gotten this far on my own, if anything he would bring more trouble than good. But of course, being me, I just had to question, “Why do I have to bind with you? What would you even use me for?” Bill sat, or well floated for a few seconds, as if pondering on what to say. “I have a… situation with this human, and in order for my plans to work, I need a physical human form to go undercover around him to catch him by surprise. He’s a dangerous man, Pine Tree. I’m only trying to save myself, and possibly the world if you would like to think about possible future events if this man were to stay alive any longer, theoretically.”  _

_ Correct me if I’m wrong, but a demon wanting to actually do good? I didn’t want to believe it, there was just no way this could be true, although… anything was possible in a crazy town like Gravity Falls. “If I was to take your offer, I’m going to have to ensure there are some boundaries to this.” Bill became intrigued at the thought of me considering his deal. “You have to tell me when you're going to use my body, don’t just take it at an inconvenient time. And don’t ruin my body! And you also need to tell me what exactly is going on, stop being so cryptic.” Bill hummed, considering all the terms I presented to him. “I like your style, you’ve always been one to read the fine print.” Wait he what? “You got yourself a deal kid!” His hand shot out, engulfed in fiery blue flames. I hesitated, but decided that my terms were good enough to seal any loopholes and took his hand in mine. The flames didn’t feel like anything, all I saw was the fire crawl up my arm. The brightness of them took up the room, Bill’s cackling ringing in my ears, I felt as though I made a big mistake. _

I shot up, still laying in the same spot in the field by the river. The sun hadn’t completely set yet, but it was no longer high in the sky like it had been before. I panicked and grabbed my stuff, running for the Shack. I hoped Mabel and my Grunkles wouldn't be completely mad or noesy about what had happened. 

I burst through the gift shop door, being greeted by a lazy Wendy on her stool. “Yo, dip stick, you alright?” she set down her magazine to look at my sweating, huffing form. “Yeah yeah, I’m fine, just didn’t want to be late getting home.” she shrugged, and went back to reading with her legs propped up. I walking into the house, heading straight to my room. My clothes stuck to my body with sweat, now seemed like a good time to take a shower.


	9. Who's Really in Danger?

I did my best to research more about Bill, digging deep into the internet and books I had stacked around my room. I also looked into binding with a demon, but the internet isn’t too helpful with this sort of thing. The most I got were weird fan fictions and links to fansites or fan art. 

In my best efforts, I sadly had to accept my defeat. All I could do now was continue my research on the inhabitants of Gravity Falls and it’s strange anomalies. Maybe, if I’m lucky, Bill will come back (if you could even consider that lucky) and I could squeeze some information out of him. I couldn’t even begin to understand his need to bind with me. What all powerful demon needs to hide from a human anyways? Maybe this guy was some crazy demon hunter or ancient witch, or maybe it was someone like Grunkle Ford! Even then, couldn’t Bill handle a little magic? Well, Bill better show up and hold up his end of the deal by giving full disclosure to the situation before I went crazy.

I decided, maybe would be a good time to put some actual clothes on and join my family who may of may not be downstairs. Grabbing a blue shirt and jeans, I slid those on and walked down the stairs. It was Wednesday, so Grunkle Stan was most likely working the tours. I didn’t see Ford in the kitchen, so he must be in the lab or something. I looked at the papers on the fridge, glancing at the Shack schedule, noticing that it would be my turn to work in a few hours. I sighed out, opening the fridge and grabbing a pitt cola. I completely forgot I had to work today, Mabel had it worse as she had to take the morning shift. At least she had Wendy to keep her company. 

Since I had time to kill, I might as well be productive since I couldn’t go to the forest. Well, I  _ could _ go to the forest, but knowing me, I’d get carried away and completely forget about working. So, that idea was trashed in favor for more research.

I sat at my desk, my journal opened to the unfinished notes I attempted to take on Bill and this whole binding situation. Most of it was crossed out or was possible theories, most being a bit too far fetched for my liking. Was there really much else I could research at this point? I let out a groan, my head falling on the hardwood with a _ thud _ . 

“Yeesh, kid.” a familiar voice called, but when I looked over in the direction of the voice, I nearly fell out of my chair with a choked gasp. What was suppose to be the triangular form I saw in my head, was instead a tall, lean man dressed in a lavish suit. His yellow bow tie and vest complimented his gold buttoned coat. His platinum blonde hair was a bit in his face, but I could still see his icy blue eye staring at me. The other eye was covered with a simple black eye patch. A black top hat floated over his head, and a black cane was used for him to lean on. “You act like you saw a ghost, oh should I say,  _ demon _ ?” he chuckled to himself at his pun that wasn’t funny at all. 

“What the hell Bill?!” I quickly got onto my feet to appear more threatening than I actually was. “What?” Bill acted like he didn’t do anything. I rubbed the bridge of my nose, “Why are you in a human form for one.” Bill straightened out his coat and bowtie as if to flaunt himself, “Well, if I’m going to be around you and other humans I need to blend in, right?” He has got to be joking me… “Bill, you have a hat, fucking  _ floating _ above you. Explain to me how that’s blending in?” Bill was displeased at my remark. “Alright, alright fine.” He grabbed the article and pulled it onto his head, rolling his eyes at me. “Bill, you look ridiculous, no one dresses like that.” “Well, I do!” Bill huffed, crossing his arms. For a demon, he sure acted like a two year old. 

“If you want to blend in, put some casual clothes on.” Bill gave me an annoyed glare, before huffing and snapping his fingers. He was now dressed in a yellow T-shirt, black skinny jeans and converse, though, the eye patch stayed. 

“Why do you have an eye patch?” I asked pointing at the accessory. Bill smirked, sending chills down my spine as he lifted it up to reveal a black void filled with speckles of stars, it was like looking into a galaxy. “Touché.” I said, as he let the eye patch fall back over his non existent eye.

Bill sat on my bed, examining my room in all its glory (more like cluterness). He seemed amused by the clothes scattered across my floor, the books upon books that littered my room in various places. I had a few posters that Mabel got me over the years to give “life” to my room. 

“Nice poster, kid.” Bill snickered, pointing at a Blondie poster hanging opposite from my bed. I glared at Bill, who was only fueled by my flustered face to cackle even more. I grumbled something about stupid demons, which he probably heard, but I didn’t care. “What are you even here for anyway?” I sneered, rolling my eyes. “Well… “ he began, standing up from the bed and pulling his pants down a bit, as they had rolled up from sitting.

“I am suppose to keep up my end of the deal so, here I am to explain what happened.” now he had my attention. “Basically, the statue that kept me from my physical form and all universes, including the mindscape, was shattered. When it was broken, I was able to reform, but was greeted by the human who decided to bring me back. I was surprised to see it wasn’t Ford or you. The kid wanted to make a deal with me, which I was happily to abide to, accept… What he wanted… I just couldn’t. The kid got angry that I decline his offer, he swore to kill me after he finished the deed he wanted my help fulfilling.” Bill scoffed at that last sentence. “Like he even could kill me. Anyways, I need to hunt this kid down before he fulfills his… plans. This kid knows too much, and who knows how far this kid will go after he gets what he wants.” Bill physically shivered at that, his eye averted from mine with a look of… Worry? Do demons even feel such emotions? Whatever this kid has planned, it’s definitely got Bill on edge. 

“Who is this kid anyway? Do I know him?” Bill seemed to ponder on that question for a moment before replying. “Xander.” he said lowly with a hint of anger. Xander… I couldn’t think of anyone in Gravity Falls by that name, and I knew everyone here. That aside, many of my previous questions were answered from this, like the mystery behind the statue. When did he get turned into a statue anyways? Did Ford do that to him? What exactly is Xander’s plans? 

I was about to begin my list of questions, but Bill cut me off before I could say anything, “I would love to stay and chat but I have some business to attend to, deals to make, energy to steal. I’ll see ya later, Pine Tree~” and like that, he was gone. 

I am a bit irritated that Bill still left me with more questions than before, not so much as giving me a chance to process everything before dashing out. What is he hiding? He seems to keep avoiding Xander’s plans, but why?

I glanced at my alarm clock to see I still had about an hour and a half till my shift. “I guess I could start some new research.” I said to myself out loud with a sigh, dragging my feet to the desk and slumping into the wooden chair.


	10. Good Things Come From Bad Decisions

I hate everything. It seems that right when I’m about to get close to answers, only more questions arise. I just can’t ever win can I? It’s no help that the internet is practically useless at this point. I feel like I have learned just about everything I can know about this whole situation, reading over everything again as if I missed something before. Bill better come back soon and give me more god damn answers, I’m tired of his cryptic riddles and vague stories.

It has been a couple of days after Bill’s first visit, no doubt he’s getting back on track with unfair deals and wreaking havoc among universes. Nonetheless, my summer has been going by pretty nicely.

Work at the Shack has gone by smoothly, although there is the occasional troublesome kids, but that’s a normal occurrence. Mabel seems to be enjoying herself too, she hangs out with Pacifica practically every week! Candy and Grenda come over just as often, if not more. 

It can be quite annoying with their late night giggling and attempts to do my makeup and nails. I end up being held down by Grenda, while mabel and candy work quickly to apply the beauty products onto me while I squirm and protest to no avail. My cheeks still sparkle from the shimmery highlight that I failed to scrub hard enough off.

A quiet Friday evening is just what I needed. I can sit on my bed, and peacefully read until I am forced into slumber. I slipped off the clothes I had been wearing, leaving me in just boxers and a T-shirt. I almost forgot to take off my binder, but when I sat on my bed and felt the constriction around my chest, I took it off and threw it blindly onto my floor.

I let my back hit the soft pillow, book in hand, ready to ease my mind.

“You know, most teens your age go out on friday nights.” I let out a quick scream and threw my book at the source of the voice. Bill caught the book, and laughed at my failed attempt to protect myself.

“Are you here to be helpful for once, or are you just going to be an ass?” I crossed my arms and rolled my eyes, unamused with the demons stoic stance and shit eating grin. He sauntered over to my bed and took a seat, forcing me to move my legs.

“Yeesh, are you always this sarcastic?” I glared at him. “Okay, you are.” I didn’t let up, waiting for him to continue.

“Anyways, I was here to tell you more about Xander.” I instantly brightened up, ready to begin my questions, but was cut off. “But since you want to sass me, I won’t.” Bill pouted his lip and turned his head like a little kid and let out a small ‘hmph!’. I practically face palmed myself. Sometimes I wondered how he had the liberty to call me a kid, when he’s here acting like the biggest baby ever.

I let out a defeated, yet annoyed sigh, “Fine, I’m sorry. Can you  _ please _ tell me about Xander?” I gritted. Bill hummed in approval, “I’m glad you asked Pine Tree!”  _ Oh brother. _

“So it turns out the problem is even worse than I initially thought!” The fact that Bill said that with a big grin was unsettling.

“Xander has access to an old witch's book of spells, how he got it I have no clue, which means he was not kidding in taking matters into his own hands. In there, there is a spell that can force magical creatures, including myself, to become a slave of the sorts to him, and follow all his commands.” I was stunned, so much was happening, and I still have yet to figure out  _ what _ Xander’s plans are. 

“And how are you so happy if everything is going to shit?!” was all I managed to say. I am still processing all that I just heard, not that it helps that I still have questions swarming through my head.

“Because he can’t use me like he initially planned! I’m bound to you, remember? Now, that doesn’t stop him from using other creatures such as fairies, but I’m an all powerful demon, kid.” Now that made some sense, but what the  _ hell _ is his plans!? 

“What  _ is _ Xander’s plans? You still have yet to inform me on that.” I sounded a lot more pissed than I actually was, but that didn’t phase Bill in the slightest.

“Oh, right. So uh…” I raised a brow, why was Bill stuttering all of a sudden? “He had plans to have you killed.” “WHAT!” I yelled a bit too loud. My hands instantly shot up to my mouth as if that would hide the sound.

“What do you mean he planned to have me killed? What the hell did I ever do to him? I don’t even know the guy!” My mind was racing, searching for answers I didn’t have. I couldn’t pick out any time I did something worthy of my life being taken away.

“Pine Tree, calm down.” Bill instructed, placing a surprisingly warm hand on my shoulder. “You didn’t directly hurt him, but some actions from your past ended up killing his family.” I...What? How could I have done that? I can’t even understand what it was that could have done that lead to the death of this kid’s parents. 

“Kid, it’s not that important, don’t stress yourself over it. It was a long time ago.” I don’t know if it was that obvious or if Bill could read my thoughts, but somehow he knew what I was thinking.

“What did I do?” Bill’s eye widened a bit, and his mouth flat lined. He knows what I did, didn’t he? “It’s not important, you wouldn’t remember it.” My gut, for some reason, told me he was lying. “So? Just tell me, you seem to know anyways.” Bill hesitated, he was bothered that I was pressing on, the way his body tensed and face froze gave it away. “Seriously, kid, it ain’t that important, it wouldn’t make sense if I told it. It was just a series of unfortunate events that led to their death, much like dominoes.” I’m still not satisfied, but Bill wasn’t giving in, hell he could probably go on for an  _ eternity _ like this.

“So, how are we going to stop him? He’s after both of us, so how is using my body as a cover up helpful?” Bill seemed relieved at the change in subject, but I just chose to ignore it and file it under the things to ask later column.

“Oh Pine Tree… You really think he’s going to expect you, a silly meat suit, to burst expert magic at him?” “Ohhh.” That made so much sense. Everything was finally clicking, it felt good to be on the knowledgable side again. 

“But first, we are going to have to con- er  _ teach _ you some magic.” I’m not sure if I heard that wrong of not, but it sounded like Bill was about to say something else. I examined Bill’s features, who was now wearing his poker face.  _ Great _ . Whatever it was, I’m sure isn’t important and I’m just overanalyzing things  _ again _ . I was focused on his eye, then his lips, then his jaw. Wow, his jaw is really stron- wait what am I doing? This is a demon I’m looking at here! A demon!

“See somethin’ ya like, kid?” Bill teased, smirking at me. My face felt hot, I knew I was probably beat red with embarrassment. “N-no!” god, why did I have to stutter? Bill seemed more amused by this, letting out a giggle. “Boy, you sure are easy to fluster!” I ripped my eyes away as Bill continued to cackle.

“You know, you can be a real pain in the ass.” I tried to sound more annoyed than I actually was, but I failed miserably. “I can show just how much of a pain in the ass I can be~” quicker than lightning, I shoved Bill, making him topple over the bed and onto the ground with a loud ‘thud’. 

“Boy, you sure pack a punch, Pine Tree.” Bill didn’t seem too pained by my push, in fact it looked like he was unaffected over all. Stupid demons.

“Can I go back to my quiet evening now?” I whined, trying to seem unamused with Bill. “But you’re so interesting, and wouldn’t you rather have someone to talk with than be all alone?” I’m sure Bill already knew my answer. 

“No.” He pretended to be hurt by that, getting theatrical with his movements. I couldn’t help but snicker. 

You know, for a demon, he’s not half bad. As much as I hate to say it, he’s quite the character. He definitely makes my Friday night more interesting.


	11. Practice Makes Perfect

“Wake up, Pine Tree!” I jerked from my sleep with a light scream, nearly falling out of my bed from the sudden yell for my awakening.

“What the hell, Bill!” My face scrunched from the bright light shining into my room. I glanced over at my alarm clock, 9:00 exactly. I let out a frustrated groan, my hands running through my messy hair, and rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.

“What are you doing waking me up this  _ fucking _ early!?” Bill only kept smiling, even at my obvious frustration.

“It’s time to practice some magic!” Bill’s hand splayed out to his sides in an exaggerated matter, the grin never leaving his face. I let out a loud sigh, letting my head fall back onto the fluffy pillow. 

“Get out of my room so I can get ready.” I gritted, using all of my effort to pull myself out of bed.

“Fine ya’  _ prude _ .” I only glared, pushing him towards the door. Part of me wondered why I didn’t protest any further, but maybe I  _ knew _ I had no other choice. Bill could probably argue for an eternity, just like i figured last night. Although, the idea of magic did seem fun, so I can’t complain too much. 

I grabbed a T-shirt, shorts, and boxers, picking up the binder from where I had tossed it the night before, and threw the clothes onto my bed. I discarded what I had on and slipped on the clean attire. I slathered on some deodorant and put on my shoes. I figured I wouldn’t need to bring much, so I grabbed my phone and knife, stuffing those into my pockets, I could grab a water or two before I leave.

I walked into my bathroom, stretching a bit as I entered. I had my attention downward at my toothbrush, applying toothpaste. When I looked up I was startled to find a intrested Bill staring over my shoulder. I would have cursed out if I didn’t have a toothbrush shoved into my mouth full of foaming paste. I scowled at his presence, he knew it too, but he didn’t care. I rolled my eyes at him, continued to brush my teeth with furrowed brows.

“You better not follow me downstairs, I need to eat and get water.” I pointed my finger in a serious manner, but Bill was anything but serious.

∆ ∆ ∆

“Where are you taking me?” It was meant to be a question, but I sounded more annoyed than anything. We had been trudging through the forest for what seemed like hours, but it had only been maybe 20 minutes. Sweat beaded my forehead, my back and chest slowly beginning to soak my shirt.

“I told you, a special open field, it won’t be much longer.” I groaned like a bored child, loud and elongated, but I felt like anything but. I hated the feeling of my hair sticking to my face, the way my skin felt tacky. Most of all, my chest was on fire, in this hot weather it made my binder feel 10 times worse. I should listen to Mabel more, she’s always telling me to not wear it when I’m out in the forest, incase I need to run from monsters.

When I snapped out of my thoughts, I saw the trees thinning out, a large open field appeared in front of us. The grass wasn’t too long or too short, and seemed soft to the touch. A few large rocks could be seen in various spots surrounding the circular terrain.

“This is it!” Bill stopped in his place, looking around with a proud stance. “It’s time for your training to start.” he turned to me, looking excited. I had to admit, I was a bit giddy myself, though I tried to hide it. Could Bill read my mind? Was hiding it pointless?

“Bill, what all does this whole,  _ binding _ thing consist of?” Bill faltered a bit, like his mind completely halted for a moment and did a U-turn.

“Well, as of right now, not much. I can see into your head and your dreams and such like always. If we keep bonding and such, we could eventually communicate telepathically, and our minds and souls will try to be one. Imagine this: your brain is filled with all your stupid meatsack stuff; emotions, thoughts, etc. And mine is filled with what makes me a demon. This bond wants our minds to be one, so, your head will take a bit of what makes me demon into yours, and vice versa.” 

“Wait what! I’m going to have part demon in my mind!” I held my head, terrified of what could be in there.

“Oh, quit the drama Pine Tree. You’re still going to have your humanity and such, you just might be a little more tolerant to killing someone, and your magic abilities will be far greater than any mortal.”

“But, then what will happen to you? From what you said, technically, some of my humanity will spill over into your head too, so-”

“So yes, I might be a little more  _ caring _ than a normal demon, but I’m still going to me.” Bill seemed to struggle with saying  _ caring _ , as if it were disgusting to just to think about, his face grimacing.

“You can even imagine it as a rope that connects our minds, I can feel you and you can feel me. But as of right now that bond isn’t very strong.” The thought of being this close to Bill was disconcerting. It was a lot to take in, but I guess being protected by an all powerful demon had it’s perks. 

“Okay, good. Now let’s begin.” Bill clapped his hands together, walking out into the middle of the grassy area. I followed in suit, but not as confidently as him.

The sun seemed hotter now that there was a lack of trees to provide shade. Bill seemed unaffected by the heat, even in his black skinny jeans. I had almost forgotten my situation, my hands about to take off my shirt, but everything ceased. A cloud of despair hung over the lingering thought of what I was about to do, but couldn’t. I tried to shake off the feeling, needing to focus on practicing magic.

“To start off, you need to learn some basic elemental spells. They are in Latin, so don’t fuck up the pronunciation. Channel your energy, say the spell, and it should work.” it doesn’t seem to hard, though I have no clue how I’m going to ‘channel my energy’. I sat in the grass, and took a deep breath, looking up at Bill and waited for further instruction.

“Let’s do fire first. So,  _ ignis _ .” Okay, simple enough. I closed my eyes, taking a deep, slow breath. I have no clue what I’m doing, but maybe  _ ‘channeling’ _ is close to meditating. I just tried to imagine putting all my energy towards my empty hands. “ _ Ignis _ .” And nothing. So I tried again, focusing harder this time. “ _ Ignis _ .” Still nothing.

“Pine Tree, you’re not channeling your energy.” Well obviously you stupid dorito.

“Then what the hell do I do? You didn’t exactly explain  _ how _ to channel my energy.”

“Right, right. So, uh, you just…” Bill seemed stumped too. Great. His hand rubbed in chin in contemplation.

“Maybe I can just show you.” He walked over to me, placing two fingers onto my birth mark. I was shocked to see images splay in my head like a movie. They stopped when his fingers no longer were in contact with my forehead. 

“You think you can do it now?” I shook my head, but still amazed at what he had just done. Would I be able to do that to him? Was this a demon thing of a bond thing? 

“Clear your mind, kid.” Oh yeah, right. Magic now, questions later.

I allowed my mind to become blank, only imagining my energy there in the dark space. It glowed a dim blue color, just floating in my headspace. I reached out to grab it, expecting to feel something, but nothing. It didn’t have a temperature and seemed weightless. With it in my hands, I began to will it out of my mind, getting it to course through my body and to my hands. My eyes shot open, “ _ Ignis _ .” dark blue flames engulfed my hands and part of my arms, though I felt nothing. A smile spread across my face, and the flames went out. 

“Good job, kid!” Bill seemed just as thrilled as me. Looking back at what I had just done, something about it seemed, vaguely familiar. I couldn’t quite place it, but maybe it was nothing.

“Are you ready to do that all over again? This time new spells.” The sun threatened to burn into my skin, and I let out an exasperated groan. There goes my whole Saturday.


	12. Time Mostly Well Spent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm new to this whole posting up stories thing, but I've had a lot of this story written for some time now, hence the large amounts of updates within two days XD  
> I should hopefully finish this story soon, possibly by Friday? No promises, but we can shoot for then!   
> For now you can enjoy some heavy dialogue and plot movement.

I can’t help but feel that maybe I’m spending more time with Bill than my own sister. Granted, I am only spending so much time as to train myself against a possibly dangerous man that’s out to get me, but I can’t help but feel bad about it. Mabel thinks that I am just exploring for monsters or doing research in my room, but in actually I’m with a dream demon that I somehow trust. 

Some days, I want nothing more than to spill the secret I have been keeping for weeks now, I want to tell her about Bill and Xander and all this mess I got into, but I can never bring myself to do it. Would she hate me? I feel a bit guilty about hiding this from Mabel, sometimes I can see the hurt in her eyes when I refuse to bring her along with me, or how I seem more distant with the amount of time I spend cooped up in my room most of the time. I want nothing more than to explain to her so she would understand, but the repercussions of telling her seem far greater.

It’s July now, our second month of summer fun, although it doesn’t seem as fun for Mabel now that I act like I avoid her. If only she knew… 

I like to use my magic for more domestic things now that I have a better grasp of it. I will turn on and off the lights without even batting an eye, or turn the pages of my book without so much as flinching, like I am right now. I refrain from using my abilities in front of Mabel and my Grunkles, out of fear of many questions and interrogative conversations. Bill seems impressed with my abilities too, but I bet he expected as much. 

Speak of the devil, er,  _ demon _ who just materialized out of thin air into my room. Not that I’m surprised anymore by his pop up visits, he tends to this more often than not. He doesn’t even give a greeting as he walks over to my desk to grab my chair and drag it next to my bed.

“So, what’s up now? More training? Or did you just come to be a creep while I read again?” I set my book down, bookmark in place so I could return to it later.

“Actually, I have more information on Xander.” he said in a serious tone opposed to his normal energetic attitude. I remained silent as a cue for him to continue, eyebrows raised in question.

“So, I took a bit of a risk a tried to locate the human, which proved to be a lot harder than I thought. But! Nonetheless, I found him, and so we need to act fast before he finds me, and more importantly,  _ you _ .” shivers ran down my spine at the thought of Xander possibly finding me. 

“Okay, so how soon are we talking?” I needed to make sure I had enough time to come up with some bullshit excuse for leaving for who knows how long.

“Well, it’s probably best to take action right now.” Bill stood up, grabbing the chair and quickly placing back in it’s rightful spot. I shot out of bed as well.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the  _ hell _ am I going to tell my family? What is out plan even going to be?” I was feeling a bit overwhelmed with the fact of how fast everything seemed to be going. 

“Psh, your family? Do you really think they’re going to questions your whereabouts that much? Just say you’re going to hang out with someone, er, something.”

“I think you forget that I don’t  _ have _ friends here.” I sneered, feeling a bit hurt having to admit to being friendless.

“Say you're just gonna go into town.”

“This late?! Bill, are you nuts?!” 

“I think you know the answer to that.”

“Fine, fuck, whatever. I’ll figure something out.”

“And as for our game plan, I’ll take over your body, take us to the location and take out this kid, and you can help be my ghost sidekick and snoop around to find the book of spells and any over potentially dangerous objects.”

“Wait,  _ ghost _ ?!”

“Yeah, when I take over your body, you’ll just follow along as a ghost that no one but me can see.” Bill said casually. All of this was bit much to take in, but with how much paranormal and weird stuff I’ve experienced, I’ll get over it.

“Now chop chop, kid!” Bill was trying pushing me out of my room, which didn’t take much effort with how easily he could move me. I guess I don’t have a choice in this do I?

I walked down the stairs, both my Grunkles sitting on the couch enjoying whatever was on the old TV. I bit my lip with anxiety, rubbing my arm a bit awkwardly as I stood at the bottom of the stairs. I turned the corner to enter the living room, attempting to act as casual as possible. 

“Hey, uh, I’m just gonna head out for a bit. I’ll be back, not sure how long it will be.” I winced, even though nothing happened. I was holding my breath, waiting for them to respond. 

Without even glancing away from the TV, Stan gave a simple “Okay.”. I didn’t even waste a second, as soon as I was out of their view, I rushed to shove my shoes on, grab the keys, and ran out of the house into the cool evening air. Bill appeared next to me, as expected. 

“We’re taking your car.” Bill said plainly, not even caring to wait for my reply. 

“So, when are we going to do the… Ya know? Possession thin-” I was cut of with Bill grabbing hold of my body, and effortless ripped what I assumed to be my soul and in place, put himself inside me (not like that!). I was a bit freaked out, seeing myself outside of my body, everything going straight through me. 

“Bill! No, I am not letting you drive!”

“Oh relax, Pine Tree. I know how to drive.” Bill waltzed to the car, though, it was anything but gracious as stumbled a bit. It was creepy looking at myself. I could see every flaw on my skin, the way my body seemed much too skinny and boney, these were things that took on a whole new perspective when you get to see it in third person rather than a mirror.

“Hmm, your body is so interesting, kid.” he hummed, starting up the car while I floated in the passenger seat next to him. Grunkle Stan’s car sputtered to life, almost coughing and hacking in a struggle to keep alive. 

“Stay out of my head!” though, I didn’t sound very threatening.

“Kid, I’m in your body, that's like placing a piece of meat in a starving dogs mouth and telling it not to eat.” I huffed in response and crossed my arms.

“Besides, we’re soul bound, it’s bound to happen at one point or another.” I hated that he was right, but I wouldn’t admit it. Anything to keep from boosting his ego.

The car drive didn’t seem too long, but time is pretty irrelevant anyways I guess. We didn’t talk much, Bill was probably plotting the whole time anyways. I am surprised to say he didn’t crash the car and was actually a decent driver. 

Bill decided to park a few minutes away from our destination, saying it’s best to park right next to the enemies hide out in case things go wrong. I didn’t protest. We sneakily, well  _ Bill _ , walked to the secluded house, if you could even call it that. It was near the cemetery, not in a neighborhood of any kind. The wood seemed to be rotting away, many pieces non existent of out of place. Windows we shattered, the foundation seemed to be falling apart, it was a complete wreck.

Without a word, Bill tiptoed through the front door that didn’t appear to have a lock. The insides was just as bad, if not worse than the outside. Foliage was growing from inside the building, the stairs hardly seemed safe or usable. Bill peered around the dark area, not sure of where to go, so I took it upon myself to search the house, almost forgetting about my current state. I effortless moved through walls, going through room after room, but found nothing. Not a sign of life anywhere besides the few rats that inhabited this deserted house.

“Check for a basement.” Bill whispered to me. I nodded in response, sending myself through the floorboards to reveal that there was, indeed, a basement. Even better, it was taken over by none other than our little friend, Xander. I rose back up to inform Bill, who followed my lead to the entrance of the downstairs space.

Slowly and cautiously, Bill stepped down the stairs, waiting to make his attack when Xander would have his back towards us. He had dark, almost black hair, shaggy and unkempt on his head. He was dressed in all black, nothing fancy though, the clothes hung on him a bit loosely and were a bit worn. He looked no older than 18, with his lack of facial hair and and hunched stature.

A bright ball of energy was projected at him, a surprised sound left his lips as the energy connected with his body. He didn’t skip a beat, jumping back onto his feet and turning to see Bill, well,  _ me _ with Bill inhabiting the body. 

“Dipper Pines, I see you took the time to learn some magic, did your little demon boyfriend teach you?” he sneered, totally ignorant to the fact that it was not just me. The fact that he knew my name was a bit disturbing.

“Think again.” Was all Bill retorted with, before firing more magic towards Xander. Bill’s teeth, er mine, were bared like an angry wolf. While they began to fight it out, I went in search of the book, finding it on top of a table, in which I sadly could not pick up. The two guys were hurling magic at one another, snarling and growling like ferocious beasts. I let out a gasp at the new person who appeared in the room. 

“Bill, look out!” but it was too late. The unknown person yanked Bill by the collar and sent him flying against the wall. I winced at the sight, knowing fully well there would be painful bruises. I could practically see Bill cursing out for my binder being so constricting. He coughed a bit, trying to regain his breath, and shakily rose to his feet. 

The man was tall, and much more muscular than Bill, and slightly larger, but not buff. His brown hair was shaved short, his green eyes a stark contrast to his pinkish tinted skin. He too wore all black clothes, though his seemed more formal than Xander’s raggedy clothes.

“Well, don’t just stand there, kill him!” Xander’s voice cracked much like mine so often did.

The mysterious man leaped into action, sending a ball of energy hurling towards Bill like it was second nature. Bill dodged it, but stumbled to regain his balance. The two began a magic brawl, sending spell after spell at one another.

I was helpless, useless, just a stupid bystander. If I could, I would be helping Bill, but with this ridiculous ghost body, I can’t do jack shit! The book is right there, literally not even 10 feet away! Bill wasn’t much better, no, he was a  _ hell _ of a lot worse. Blood was starting to stain my clothes, my face beaten, magic was being shot from every direction. 

Come on, Dipper! Think,  _ think _ …

Wait, of course! Why didn’t I think of this sooner! I tried to block out the commotion around me, taking a deep breath. I hope this works… _ Channel it _ .  _ Clear your mind _ . “ _ Ignis _ .”

Although no one could see me, a burst of fire was projected at Xander’s henchman, catching him off guard, in which Bill took as his opportunity to attack. Xander seemed confused, though he appeared more terrified as he frantically searching around the room for the source, but finding nothing.

“Bill! I’ll distract him, you need to teleport the book to the car, it’s on the table!” I shouted. Bill didn’t look my way, I just hoped he could hear me over their grunts and growls. I took the initiative to get the large man's attention with some more fire spells, and he gladly took the bait. Confused and angry, his attention was towards me, allowing Bill to focus for a few seconds to blip the book to the car. 

“What the he-” Bill knocked out Xander with the snap of his fingers, sending his dark form to the ground. The man didn’t seem too moved by it, or even notice it for that matter, but he was now more interested in the fact that Bill wasn’t being battered at the moment. Okay, we have the book, Xander is out cold, now we need to escape without this guy following us.

“Bill!” He doesn’t even flinch at his name. “What are we going to do? How do we get out of here without him following?!” Bill was still fighting, groaning at each punch or shock of magic, but somehow I could tell he was thinking about what I had just said. His fighting didn’t falter while thinking deeply, but that didn’t mean he was fighting well either.

I was trying to run through possible options too, but before I could begin to list of suggestions, Bill had an idea of his own. He closed his eyes for a second, though I had no clue what he was doing.

“Bill, what the hell are you doing!” my voice cracked. I watched in terror, the aggressor seemingly preparing a large attack with a insidious cackling. Bill didn’t move a muscle at the monstrous sound, he took in a deep breath, then his eyes shot open. They were glowing a bright blue, cyan shackles appeared from within the ground and wrapped around the attacker’s limbs. He became pinned to the wall, unable to move, and apparently unable to cast magic as his failed attempts dissipated from his finger tips. 

Something about this was unsettling, almost deja vu but much more terrifying. Some images passed through my head, but were gone as soon as they came. My head began to throb in pain, my brain was trying to tell me something but I couldn’t quite make it out, like something was blocked off, erased.

“Dipper let’s go!” The demon's voice commanded. I snapped out of my painful thoughts to see a the murder scene, the other guy obviously never stood a chance against Bill.

Bill bolted up the stairs, not looking back as he navigated through the house. I floated up through the foundation and met him in the car, the book lying in the passenger seat. Bill jumped into the car and quickly started the engine, driving off with a screech of tires.


	13. Repeat

I can’t help but wonder why I felt the way I did seeing that brunet man shackled seemed to trigger something within me. I hadn’t ever had a similar experience, had I? Of course not, you would think I’d remember something like that. I let out an exasperated sigh, throwing my head back to hit my pillow, it felt nice to have my body back, but these bruise were doing a number on me. 

Mabel questioned my late arrival and beat up appearance, but I brushed off stating I merely feel down. The way her eyebrow raised at me in disbelief made me feel like shit for lying to my twin, but all she could do was huff and send me off to bed with a yawn. I had a feeling she would pry tomorrow when we both had the energy to form coherent sentences. It didn’t make me feel any better about myself though. What could I even say? I let a demon borrow my body to stop this guy from killing me. She would kill me! Complete irony but it’s true! I would never hear the end of it.

Everything's a mess, but at least I have one less problem to worry about. We burned the book, demolishing any chaos that book could potentially bring. But now what? I’m stuck with a demon, my sister could end up finding out about said demon, and my head keeps pounding every time those damn shackles appear in my head!

Maybe I’m thinking too much and need some sleep. Before I can let any other intrusive thoughts enter my mind, I slowly drift off into a deep slumber.

∆ ∆ ∆

I wake up, the sunlight beaming into my foggy eyes. I couldn’t quiet recall the events of yesterday, but the soreness that covered my body was an instant reminder when I tried to move. The book. Xander. Bill. Everything flooded into my mind like the Gravity Falls waterfall. And, those… Chains. “Agh!” my head was throbbing at just the mention of it. Maybe it’s best to not think about it. I swung my body with a grunt out of bed, maybe also because I knew I had work today. Thankfully, Mabel took the morning shift. Looking at the time, it was 10:40 a.m. Great, plenty of time to leisurely get ready. As I passed the mirror, I couldn’t help but stop and backtrack a few steps. I examined my reflection, grimacing at the unwanted lumps and curves of my unbinded body. Disgusting. I held myself at the invective thoughts protruding my mind. I snapped my head away and quickly left the room, or so I was going to until I ran face first into the all too familiar body of Bill Cipher.

“Kid, stop beating yourself up so much over it.” he gave me a solemn look, no sign of sarcasm on his body. I tried to mask the feelings of self hatred and almost guilt of knowing Bill was right.

“Stop that, I know what you’re doing.” For some unforeseen reason, rage filled my body. I pushed past Bill with curled fist stif by my sides.

“Pine Tree, wait.” Bill said all too calmly, effortlessly grasping my wrist. He pulled me back and spun me around, holding me close to his body. The last thing I remember clearly was the tears that soon spilled out of my puffy eyes. Somewhere in there, I was sobbing uncontrollably, Bill cooing me to stop. At some point I began ranting about everything on my mind, how I hated my chest, how everything and anything was complete shit. Then, I had brought up the pains in my head, which seemed to spark something in Bill, as he froze at those words. I felt him tense slightly, causing me to snap out of my distressed state long enough to try and figure out why he had reacted that way. 

“Bill, are you not telling me something?” I was genuinely confused. Almost hurt that Bill was keeping secrets from me.

“Of course not Pine Tree, but I think I can do something to help you with all of this. Do you want to feel better?” How could anyone deny and offer like that? I know I wouldn’t.

“What’s the catch?”

“Nothing, I’ll do it just out of the small kindness of my non-existent heart.” I was taken aback by this, but for some reason, I trust him. No questioning, no accusations, I just believe him. Maybe it’s the bond, maybe I’m so fucked up I can’t think straight, whatever it is, I don’t care.

“If I help with your head, I’m going to have to steal some energy from you in order to help with…” Bill gestured towards my chest. “That.” 

“Energy? What the hell is that?” The sound of anything being taken from my body by a demon was the least comforting thing to hear at the moment.

“Don’t worry, it’s just the energy all humans possess, it doesn’t do much for you all, but demons can use it as a source of power. Think of it as, your my battery, you’ll recharge as long as you stay healthy, and I can use it to do more complicated magic.” It sounds reasonable.

“Will it hurt?” I asked hesitantly.

“The energy? No. The actual spells themselves? Maybe, but I believe you can get through it.” He, believed in me? The thought of that made me giddy, my stomach fluttering.

“Okay, here goes nothing.” Bill placed a hand on my forehead, a bright light shining from his touch. I could feel Bill within my mind, but I wasn’t sure what he was doing. All I could do was feel. I head splitting pain pierced through my brain, like a knife being shoved into me, but quickly dissipated. I felt as though a weight had been lifted. But, then other things began to open up, it was as if I was being projected into the mindscape. Bill was there, in his triangle form, also surprised by my presence.

“W-what are you doing in here?” he asked, completely clueless of what just happened.

“I don’t know, you tell me. Why did you bring me to the mindscape?” I shrugged. 

“Well ,this isn’t really the mindscape you’re thinking of, kid. This is just your mind, plain and simple. Look around.” I did as Bill said, and he couldn't be more right. The mindscape was dark, you could see images flash by or imagine a whole new world. This wasn’t the mindscape Bill showed me mere weeks ago. But this, this was full of life and color, everything sectioned off with some order I had no knowledge of into endless corridors of bubbles. I couldn’t help but notice some halls were blocked off by a large iron chain and lock. Did Bill do that?

“Well, I guess me tampering with your mind triggered something with our bond, causing this to happen.” I can’t wrap my mind around how or why this would happen, but abnormal things always happened to me, so why bother questioning it?

“So, we’re closer now because of this?” I asked, knowing I was stating the obvious.

“Technically, yes.” My eyes fluttered open again, Bill sitting in the same spot as if he never left. 

“Not so bad, right?” Bill asked, referring to my mind. Thinking about it, I do feel pretty good. I don’t feel anxious or depressed.

“Yeah, not bad.” I agreed confidentiality. 

“Okay, time for part two. This might hurt a lot more, so just bare with me, kid.” I nodded in agreement. Bill moved from off the bed, motioning for me to lay down. He slowly and cautiously lifted my shirt up, which made me cringe slightly, but I relaxed a bit at Bill’s reassuring eyes. His hands hovered over my chest, glowing with blue magic in beautiful cyan shades. I couldn’t feel a thing, and kind of felt cocky for a second, but then the pain hit. My chest was on fire, stabbing pains causing me to scream out muffled cursed as I bit down on my lip. I shut my eyes closed tightly, praying for the pain to go away. A few stray tears left my eyes.

“It’s done.” Bill smiled down at me, a real, human like smile. I let my eyes open once more, the pain still lingering, but fading away. I glanced down at my chest, or what use to be of it. I slowly sat up, keeping my shirt up, and walked to the mirror to stare at my flattened chest.

“T-thank you.” I choked out, too ecstatic for words. I grabbed Bill into a tight hug, repeating those words until they were meaningless.


	14. A New Found Confidence

I don’t think I’ve stopped staring at my new chest, or running my hands along the mostly flat surface. The smile on my face feels permanent, my cheeks sore and it never fading. Mabel noticed my joyful nature and questioned it, but I just brushed it off. I almost let it slip, but logic got the better of me and kept my mouth shut. I’m in some deep shit, but there’s no going back now.

Looking in the mirror of our bathroom, my eyes are glued to the one part of my body that I can, with confidence, be proud of. My hands grazed the skin, I could feel everything, the heat in my finger tips, the pressure from my hands, it was so real. 

Back in my room, I stop by the mirror yet again to admire my new chest. My  _ better _ chest. The sun has begun to set leaving a pink and purple sky to cast dim light into my room. I decide that tonight, I can sleep without a shirt. This can be the first night I can do so without feeling some kind of dysphoria at what I look down at, or what I feel while laying on my stomach. Letting my body crash into the bed, I flip my body over onto my stomach, letting the feeling of the soft sheets around me bring joy. It was almost weird not feeling slightly elevated, but I wouldn’t miss it.

Thinking back over the day, I had such confidence, swaggering everywhere I went. I held myself differently, like a literal weight was lifted just as much as the metaphorical one was. I kinda feel invincible, like nothing can bring me down. I let myself slip into sleep, maybe so I can wake up faster and experience my new chest, but I won’t admit that.

∆ ∆ ∆

“Pssssst.” I wasn’t sure if I was dreaming, but another whisper proved that maybe it was real. The bright yellow sunlight spilled into the room, making it impossible to see at first, but I was warm. I let out a muffled groan from within my blankets, lifting my head slightly to try and look around the room. 

“Wake up sleepy head.” The familiar female voice shook me out of my morning daze. Mabel was sitting in my desk chair, giving me a wide grin and seemingly already dressed for the day. What time was it anyways? 

“Dipper, it’s 10:00, time to get up!” Mabel jumped out of the chair and skipped over to my bed. Taking the blanket I was wrapped in, she yanked it with all her might, sending me toppling to the floor along with the fluffy cover. 

“Okay, okay, geez! I’m up!” I moaned in pain, trying to sit up off the hard wooden floor. “What is up anyways? Why are you in here?” Mabel’s smile didn’t falter, maybe it even grew wider somehow.

“Because silly! It’s Sibling Summer Day! Get dressed we’re going out.” Mabel patted my messy hair, leaving the room for me to get dressed. Getting up to put the blanket on the bed, I noticed my chest that I had nearly forgotten. My chest fell, knowing the certain trouble I could have been in if Mabel saw, but that blanket was a life saver. I let out a breath and set the blanket down and walked over to my dresser. 

Mabel and I started this tradition a few years ago of having a day where we just hung out and went all over town, no friends, no Grunkles, just some good ol’ twin time. The second Friday of July was our set date, and I can’t believe I had forgotten it! 

I pulled a red shirt and jeans out of the dresser and ran to the bathroom to quickly make myself presentable and nice smelling. My shower was a new experience, the feeling of water rolling smoothly down the chest felt… indescribable, and feeling my shirt completely without my binder was pure bliss. I probably sound like a broken tape, but it’s my mind and I will think how I please!

∆ ∆ ∆

After a shitty indie movie, courtesy of Mabel, and endless window shopping where I was the bag boy, I decided that now was my chance to suggest something  _ actually _ fun before Mabel got anymore ideas. I didn’t hate all that we had done, spending time with Mabel was great! I just really don’t care for movies and shopping unlike my spontaneous sister.

“Here, how about we go do something that’s actually fun.” I sat up from the love seat I had been occupying, motioning towards the door.

“Wait, I gotta take this off first bro bro!” Mabel giggled, disappearing into the dressing room. I groaned at having to wait even longer to leave, but thankfully she didn’t take too long. We left the store, the day still contained a bit of life as the sun hadn’t set yet.

“So, where are we going?” Mabel asked as she followed me down the street. 

“You’ll see.” I said mischievously with a smirk. I was relieved to finally do something I wanted to do, those stores made me nauseous from all the perfume in the air. Mabel was rambling on about something, but I was stuck in my own thoughts. I had almost forgotten about Bill. What was next? I hadn’t seen him since that day, that greatful and blessed day that changed everything.

After a bit of walking, we arrived. I splayed my hands out in a gesture to show off the park. It wasn’t extravagant, but it was definitely nice. As if to challenge me, Mabel bolted to the swings, commencing a race. 

On the swings, Mabel and I competed to see who could swing the highest, the sky was filled with our laughter and playful banter. I don’t think anything could honestly make me happier. We jumped from the swings and ran to the park, playing a game of tag that no one initiated, it was just a given. I ran around trying to catch Mabel, who ninja'd away from my extended hands. 

“You can’t catch me dippin’ sauce!” Mabel giggled as she hopped onto the jungle gym. I followed in suit, almost sure that I could tag her. Mabel managed to climb over the slide with speed, thinking she could pull me off her track, but all too quickly she lost her footing. 

All too quickly she was falling backwards.

All too quickly my instincts came in.

Mabel was hovering a few inches from the ground, eye still shut tightly in a painful cringe. Her anticipation of the ground never came, so her eyes slowly opened to see me, hands out in front of me covered in dark blue flames. Slowly, I allowed her body to softly lay on the ground, the fire dissipating from my arms.

“Dipper, I-” Mabel seemed confused and lost for words, as if what just happened was too much to grasp. I know I’m in big trouble now, but I can easily lie about how and why I learned magic. I don’t understand why she is so shocked considering all the monsters and creatures we’ve encountered.

“I can explain!” I quickly blurted out. I swung onto the slide and made my way over to Mabel who still hadn’t moved from the ground. 

“Look, I found some stuff on magic and decided to teach myself, in the case of another monster attack, and I guess if you were ever in trouble too… ” I gave the most innocent puppy dog eyes I could pull. Mabel seemed conflicted, deciding whether or not this was a good idea.

“Promise me one thing.” she suddenly spoke up in a quiet voice. “Promise me… Promise it’s not any demons?”

“Promise.”

∆ ∆ ∆

I feel so… how do I describe it, wrong? Guilty? Yeah, guilty. I can’t believe I just lied to my twin,  _ to her face _ . As I lay here in bed, I’m contemplating whether to run to her, just tell her everything and come clean.

“We wouldn’t want to do that now would we.” My eyes unsurprisingly turned to the blond in my room. He was sitting backwards on my desk chair, but stood up to walk over to me.

“But, it feels so  _ wrong _ to lie to my own sister, I mean we’ve always told eachother everything.” my hands moved around theatrically to display my confliction.

“You might feel worse about what could happen if she did know.” I guess he had a point, so maybe I just need to move on from this. 

“Goodnight, Bill.”


	15. Complete

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boop! Explict up ahead!

Saturday morning, one of my favorites as I get to lounge around in bed after sleeping in till 12. Mabel doesn’t appreciate my laziness and says that sleeping in isn’t good for me, but to hell with that! I’m not going to wake up early on my summer vacation. Sometimes I end rolling out of bed to use the restroom and grab some food, rarely to actually go out and do something as I don’t have friends, unlike Mabel. 

For a strange reason, though, I do feel compelled to do  _ something _ . Nothing extravagant, but maybe a little more than just laying in bed alone all day. My cozy bed tries to change my mind with it’s soft blankets and warm pillows, but my mind is fighting against it’s powerful force.

I suddenly jerk away from my blankets and pillow to force myself out of bed and think of something to do. What is there to do?

“Look’s like someone is in need of some company.” I blink for a moment, being caught off guard as to how Bill ended up in my room, even though this isn’t a new thing. 

“How is it that you always come at perfect moments? Are you constantly reading my mind?” I question, as I am a bit suspicious to his perfectly timed entries.

“Perhaps.” He says blandly, not appearing to elaborate on that thought. 

“Okay then creep.” I say sarcastically. Standing here, I look down and suddenly remember I’m shirtless, but then I also remember I no longer have a reason to need a shirt. Although, Bill is weird and I’m still not into the idea of being half naked in front of people. I opt to find a shirt on the floor and pull it over my head.

“Well how else will I keep my Pine Tree safe~” He cooes. I reply with a scoff, pushing past him to throw the other clothes on the ground into a basket in the corner. Maybe I did that just to hide the blush that lightly dusted my cheeks.

“Dippppperrrrrr.” I hear Mabel purring as she is fast approaching my room. Without another thought, I grab Bill by the shoulder and throw him into the closet, shutting the door behind him. 

“Hey Dip- oh you’re awake! Did you want some pancakes, I made some.” I can see the bits of flower that stuck to her pink cheeks and clothes, confirming that she was indeed cooking. 

“Yeah, I’ll be down in a minute.” She gives me a bright smile, leaving me alone in my room again as she closes the door… Well alone with that stupid demon. I wait a few moments, listening to her descend the stairs once again.

“Okay, you can come out now.” Bill emerges from the closet, unfazed by what just happened. I’m not too sure what I’ll do about Bill, but he sure as hell can’t come downstairs with me.

“You stay here while I go eat, I’ll be back.” Bill sneers at me and folds his arms. 

“Gee, thanks kid.” I just roll my eyes and leave the room. 

Part of me says I should take my sweet time, thought, another part of me says I should get back to him as soon as possible. I try and shove down the latter, thought, afraid to admit that maybe I do like the demons company more than I let on.

∆ ∆ ∆

I don’t think I’ve spent more time talking to anyone than I just have with Bill. After 8 straight hours of conversation, and still continuing, I have come to the conclusion that Bill and I get along way better than I do with any person in the world, aside from my sister. 

I don’t know how, but Bill is just so intriguing. He tells me stories of how history actually happened, like the pyramids in Egypt, as he claims he was the influence of them. He’s been through more wars than I can count, including ones and earth and ones in his own realm. If I can think of it, he can answer any of my questions, like how his people differ from ours or the origin of magic. Bill is like a walking Google… no better than Google.

“Bill, you’re actually all that bad. Hell, you’re great!” The demon pretends to blush as he shies away into his shoulder like a schoolgirl. 

“Oh, you’re too sweet Pine Tree.” and contrary to popular belief, or at least my old belief, Bill can be hilarious too. I probably gre a six pack from how much Bill made me laugh. Yeah, he cracks shitty puns a lot, but he has some funny jokes up his sleeve.

“Don’t you usually have something to be doing by now?” I ask. Bill has never spent this much time with me before, as he’s always off somewhere doing some “job”.

“If there is, it can wait.” My heart stops for a short moment. I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face at how I seem to be the most important priority to Bill. 

“Oh, so what do you wanna do now?” I ask in a hushed voice.

“Whatever you want to, Pine Tree.”  _ You _ . Wait, what am I thinking?! This is a demon, Dipper! As much as I would love to wipe that smirk off his beautiful face with my lips, this is all kinds of fucked up.

Bill chuckles out of nowhere and all my thinking stops. I had forgotten about the bond, how Bill can see into my thoughts.

“Say no more, kid.” Before I can think of a response, Bill’s lips are pressed against mine. They’re soft compared to my chapped lips.

My eyes slip closed as I give in to the demon. All questionable and conflicted thoughts are shut off as I throw out any cares I had before. His lips move with mine slowly, his hands lightly grazing my cheek and side. I let him carefully lay me down, any regrets I might have had are nowhere to be found. 

The kiss deepens as Bill slips a hot tongue into my gasping mouth. My body shivers under his touch as his hands grow more needy and rough. I let out small, muffled whimpers, trying to remember to keep it quiet, but Bill makes that very hard.

Bill tugs at my shirt, breaking the kiss for a second to pull the shirt over my head. He kisses me again, but soon is trailing down my jaw, then my neck. He continues to nip and suck down my chest, stopping to give extra attention to my nipples. Soft moans and gasps leave my mouth as his tongue flicks over each one. 

The farther down he goes, the more I squirm, causing him to take hold of my hips to keep me in place. Once he reaches my boxers, he doesn’t bother to move his hands, he takes the waist band between his teeth and tugs at them. My hands shoot down to his head to make him stop, I had almost forgotten my lack of within the heat of the moment.

“I- um… “ I’m not quite sure what to say, but I’m sure Bill gets the picture. He leans forward, right next to my ear, I can feel his hot breath tickling my neck.

“I can give you another favor.” he whispers lowly. I don’t have to answer for him to know that I want that favor. My world would be complete with that favor.

Without another word said, Bill goes back to my boxers, slowly pulling them off of my hips. I still cringe away, afraid of his reaction, afraid of my own too probably. I revert back to shutting my eyes tight and wait for it to all be over with.

I can feel it, the same warm feeling as before, then there’s pain. So much pain. I grab the pillow i had been laying on and throw it over my face, biting down on the fluffy object. I let out pained screams until Bill finishes, which feels like forever. When he does, I lay there for a moment, breathing heavily into the now sweat covered pillow. Slowly, but surely, I remove the makeshift gag. Looking down, I’m not sure what to expect, maybe Bill decided to mess with me and put an octopus arm instead or some kind of horrific appendage, but part of me knew Bill was being sincere in his offer.

“Oh my-” I gasp out at what I’m staring down at. My horrible predictions couldn’t have been more wrong as I was now staring at the new part of me, the last piece to my puzzle. My hand slowly slithered down the bed to touch it, and sure enough I could feel it, but it was very sore. Bill could probably tell by the grimace that crossed my face.

“Here, I can fix that too, just don’t freak out.” I had just enough time to process his sentence before his mouth was around my cock, my head flew back hard against the bed in a mix of pain and pleasure. My hips jerked up, though Bill didn’t seem to mind. His head bobbed with increasing speed, the pain quickly dissipating as fast as he moved. Quiet moans and pleads spilled from my lips, I felt myself becoming so close to my climax, but Bill pulled away right before I could. I let out a tiny whine.

“Get on your knees.” I quickly flipped over into doggy style shamelessly. My face was burning hot, almost as hot as the pool in my stomach. I heard the sound of something popping, then a squirting noise. As I looked over my shoulder in curiosity, a slick finger slid into my hole with ease. I took in a sharp gasp, my head lolling back. Every pump of his finger was pure bliss, even more so as he added more fingers. My tongue was hanging out of my mouth at this point, little pants poured out of my open mouth. 

I’m not quite sure how long this has gone on for, but the next thing I know I’m being filled to the brim by Bill’s cock. Fuck, I don’t know how much longer I can hold out for though. Bill’s fingers get wrapped up in my chocolate curls and yank hard. He’s pounding hard and fast into me, I can’t contain the sounds of ecstasy that escape my mouth. My member twitches as I release all over my bed, my mind is reduced to mush as I’m left in a sex daze for a few seconds. Bill is still trusting through it all, then takes a few hard thrusts as he also finishes inside of me.

Both of us collapsed onto the bed a sweaty mess. I think about how I need to shower and change my sheets before sleeping, but at the same time Bill’s arms are just too warm and comfy to leave. I should really get up, but my mind and body say otherwise, my arms and legs refuse to move. Laying here won’t be that bad anyways, I’ll just clean up in the morning. Yeah, the morning…  



	16. Down Hill

_ “You’re mine now.” I low rumbling voice beckons from somewhere in the darkness. The ground beneath my feet shakes with such force, I tumble down onto my hands and knees. I can hear other whispering voices from all around me, they hiss and moan like their circling their prey, though I can’t see this predator. I felt small and helpless compared to the vast darkness that began to suffocate my lungs. It’s so hard to breath, tears prickle at the ends of my eyes and I scratch at my throat as I feel my head grow light from lack of oxygen. _

_ “Pathetic.” The words cut through me like a knife. I can feel the pang of the blade piercing through my heaving chest. It’s still completely black all around me.  _

_ “Weak.” Another stab of pain courses through my body from my stomach. I feel sick, but I feel to tired to do anything about it. I feel as though I am about to give in, just lay down everything and fall to the floor, begging for mercy. _

_ “Plan. Plan. Plan.” The words echo and bounce off of walls I was unaware existed, but the booming voice bellowed it out like a chant. The voice grew louder and louder, as if someone was approaching. I panicked. My heart was pumping, my body was convulsing, but everything seemed to stop. I let out a bloodcurdling scream into the nothingness. _

I quickly sat up in a sweaty panic, tangled with my sheets. My hands shot up to my body as if to assure myself I was still real. Looking around, I was in my room, thank God I was in my room. My hand was clutching my still rapid beating heart, which didn’t let up as a hand was placed on my arm.

I let out a fearful squeak, but soon realized it was only Bill. He looked wide awake, yet cozy in the spot by the wall he had taken up.

“It’s okay, go back to sleep, I’ll protect you.” Bill demanded in a soothing tone. It almost sounded sarcastic, but Bill’s expression didn’t falter while deeply staring into my foggy eyes. Without another word, I did as I was told and let myself fall back to sleep, again putting my trust in the demon that he would keep his word.

∆ ∆ ∆

“Bro bro, you should probably wa-” Mabel’s chipper voice woke me up, or maybe my body knew instantly the trouble I was soon to be in and went into fight or flight automatically. Sitting up instantly, my eyes were as wide as saucers, unable to sputter out some excuse. When I looked over, I was surprised to find an empty spot where Bill had once occupied. He must have left for a job or something, but then why is Mabel so…  _ Oh no _ .

“Dipper, I had no idea you got surgery, when did that happen? And where are your scars? How did you heal so quickly?” The questions came pouring out like a river as Mabel was unable to pry her eyes away from my bare chest. She rushes over to me and sits on the edge of the bed.

“Magic!” I blurted out. The moment the word came out my mouth, I instantly regretted it. So much for siblings tell each other everything. So much for no more lies. So much for all our promises.

“I- uh, was able to use some magic and figured out a way t-to do it. I wasn’t sure if it w-would be effective, that’s why I didn’t tell you right away, I’m sorry Mab’s.” My head hung low like a kicked puppy. I just keep sinking deeper and deeper into my lies, but their quicksand. 

Mabel seemed unsure about how to respond, or even feel about my shenanigans behind her back. Being her twin, I can tell she’s hurt, maybe even betrayed that she’s not more included in my life as she has been before. I can’t blame her, but this is for her own good. I’m protecting her and that should be enough to make me feel justified, right?

“Well, I’m glad that it seems to be working! How does it feel?” Mabel placed a careful hand on the bare skin and lightly ghosted over the mostly flat surface.

“It’s great! I feel better than I ever have in a long time to be honest.” Mabel smiles at my obvious happiness, and that’s not something I’m lying about.

“Well, come on down stairs for some breakfast. If you haven’t noticed I’m trying to wake you up earlier.” I groan at how my sister is still stuck on my supposed “bad habit”. With that, she stands up and saunters out of my room. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding before getting out of my bed as well to put on a random shirt from my drawer. 

I gallop down the creaky steps and into the kitchen to find Mabel and my grunkles already seated at the round breakfast table, chatting amongst themselves.

“Morning Dipper, I take it you slept well?” Ford asks in a sing song voice. Ford tends to be more of a morning person than grunkle Stan, who is currently sipping his coffee while reading a newspaper.

“Yeah, I slept pretty well. You seem pretty happy yourself, what’s up with that.” I point out as I shovel some eggs onto my plate.

“Well, I think I finally have a lead on—an  _ investigation  _ I’ve been conducting, which could possibly save a lot of people.” He announces proudly. I find it odd that he has left out major details, considering this is a life of death sort of job Ford has described.

“What exactly  _ is _ the investigation about?” I ask innocently, though I’m beginning to have a hunch on what this is about.

“Part of the whole, keeping people safe, include you both. And to do so I can not disclose any information without endangering you kids.” Ford takes a sip of his black coffee, signaling that his answer is final. I guess I won’t press further, but something in me hopes Ford’s leads are wrong. The last thing I need is him finding out about Bill and I’s…  _ relationship _ .

∆ ∆ ∆

“Dipper?” Mabel peeks her head into my room with caution. 

“Yeah, I’m here.” I assure. I set my book down on the dresser by my bed, marking the page I was just reading.

“I’m, well, I’m worried Dipper. About you.” I raised a questioning eyebrow. Mabel’s serious tone kind of scared me. Did she know something? 

“It’s just… Well the magic and I know you’ve been really wanting surgery, and I understand! It’s just, the magic came out of nowhere, and the last time you used it… you know.” Mabel shrugged.

“I know what? What do you mean?” Mabel seems taken aback by my genuine confusion, as if I should know this.

“Dipper, don’t make me say it.” Mabel warned hesitantly. I remained silent.

“From Weirdmaggedon…” she said lowly, I almost couldn’t hear her say it. She took in a shaky breath, as if she was about to cry. I am totally lost at this point, what is this thing and why does it make my twin so sad?

“Mabel, what is that?” I asked reluctantly. I cringed, anticipating the worst from my sister at my ignorance to the topic that seemed so eventful to her.

“Are you serious?!” Mabel stood up abruptly. “You seriously don’t remember on of the most traumatizing summer’s of our lives. We almost  _ died _ , Dipper! All because you were stupid enough to listen to that stupid demon!” Mabel had tears streaming down her face as she yelled at me. I felt terrible as each word fell from her pretty pink lips like venom. I had never seen my sister so moved, not after her failed summer loves, not after those girls made fun of Mabel in 8th grade, not ever.

“I’m sorry, Mabel. I just… I don’t know, I can’t remember any of that.” But now I’m beginning to wonder how could I have forgotten something as terrible as that. 

“Dipper, promise me.” She paused. “Promise me Bill isn’t manipulating you, promise me he isn’t hurting you again.” she fell into my arms without warning, sobbing uncontrollably. Her words echoed through my head, reverberating from all sides like a broken record booming down a tunnel. I wanted nothing more than to tell her I’m sorry and tell her I would fix this, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Maybe it’s pride, maybe it’s fear, call it what you want but right now I see it as protecting my sister from unforeseen dangers of the possible future.

“I-I promise.” I said timidly. My heart sank into the deepest pits of soul.

I let her cry into my shoulder for what seemed like hours, no words exchanged, just smooth circles being rubbed into her shivering back. What could I even say anyways? 

Her uneven breathing slowly regained its normal rhythm as her sobs became quiet sniffles. We laid in my bed for a while, still speechless, but words wouldn’t do anything right now. I let her cling to my body as if she would never see me again, and maybe that would be true one day, but not today.

Mabel’s eyes were hooded, sleep starting to take over her exhausted body. I wasn’t sure if she wanted to have a sleepover in my room or not, but I’m not cruel enough to make her leave. I let her fall limp in my arms as we both drifted into sleep, we could both use it.

∆ ∆ ∆

When I woke up, it was morning, but Mabel had abandoned my bed. I stretched my body, feeling bones creak and crack, and let out a large yawn. Hmm, Mabel. We had a sleepover last night, but I don’t really remember much from it. Mabel was… crying? Why was she crying? My head began to throb intensely. Okay, bad idea. My hands shot up to rub my head, as if that would alleviate the pounding in my skull. 

I decided to go look for my sister and make sure she was okay. Down the stairs, no one. So, maybe she is in her room? I walk down the hall and stop at her brightly decorated door. Empty. 

I check to the whole house and find that no one is here. The Shack! Maybe she’s working already. I head to the gift shop to find Wendy at her normal post behind the counter with some magazine.

“Have you seen Mabel?” Wendy doesn’t even move a muscle from her laid back position.

“No, but maybe she’s off with her friend Pacifica.” It doesn’t surprise me with how close they are. Mable must be fine, and I can somewhat trust Pacifica to provide the comfort Mabel needs, if she needs it.

Since my shift doesn’t start for another few hours, I decide to retreat back to my room like the lazy bum I am. Just when I think everything is normal, a certain  _ demon _ is standing in my room.

“Oh, hey Bill.” I say enthusiastically as I am still recovering from my morning daze.

“Pine Tree, can we talk?”


	17. Honey Whiskey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honey Whiskey- Nothing but Thieves  
> Highly recommend listening to this song for this chapter :)  
> Warning: explicit!
> 
> And the walls came tumbling down!

In the midst of my confusion, anger boiled inside me. He wanted to talk? No, I think  _ he _ needs to talk to me and explain some shit.

“You’re damn right we need to fucking talk. You have some explaining to do.” I poked his chest with a accusative finger.

“Watch yourself, kid.” Bill warned. He took in a deep breath as if composing himself before continuing. “What is it that you want to talk about?” 

“You need to explain to me about Weirdmaggedon. What happened? And why don’t I recall it? Mabel remembers it, so did you plant those memories?” The questions that cluttered my mind just came out like a roaring river, I didn’t care if I sounded ridiculous. 

“Okay.” was all Bill replied with. That one word sent me into a livid state. I don’t even know why I’m so mad. Confusion? Betrayal? 

“Okay?! Start explaining, and don’t lie!” My brows were furrowed and arms were crossed as I awaited for Bill’s answer.

“When you were 12, I started the apocalypse. I wanted you to rule by my side, you’re smart and powerful, and I promised to protect those you loved as long as you agreed. Sadly, your family took you from me and defeated me, trapping my existence in a stone statue.” I was stunned. He actually told the truth, but why?

“Why did you decide not to lie? Why are you back anyways?”

“I want you to trust me. And, I’ve learned from my previous mistake that I have no business in trying to take over your world. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.” Trust is a funny word isn’t it? Especially coming from a demon of all people. Now that I know what I know, I can almost visualize parts of the apocalypse, like old memories are finally breaking out of their locked doors. Maybe that is what’s happening in my mind. All of this information really hurts though. It  _ really _ hurts.

“ _ Bow down to your new king and ruler!” a nasally voice booms across the town I once knew so well. This place was a wreck. Buildings crumbling, foliage on fire, citizens running and screaming for their lives as flying eyeballs took them up from the streets. And all I could do was stand, frozen, as the people I’ve come to know are being plucked off like chickens in a farm. _

_ “Bill, y-you can’t do this.” I said weakly from his side, though he probably could care less about what I think. His maniacal laughter echoed in my ears, sending shivers down my spine like chalk on a board. Either he didn’t hear me over the chaos or chose to ignore me.  _

_ “Let’s go boys! Party tonight in the fearamid!” His monster goons cheered in unison. _

_ “You too Pine Tree, we’re gonna have extra fun.” he blinked at me, though it was probably supposed to be a wink. I dreaded what Bill had planned for me that night. And I was completely right to. _

_ As the party began, monsters all around were drinking, probably alcohol as their behavior reflected it. Bill was no different. Drink after drink, not showing any signs of stopping until he saw me and was reminded of his promise. He took me to a room hidden away from the crowd, the door was tall and  grand looking, most likely his room. The memory is kind of fuzzy from that point, but I can see myself, hanging from ropes with my body exposed. It was humiliating, given the circumstances of the time. I felt gross, incompetent, and powerless. I couldn’t save my friends and family, and here I was being the sex slave of what we thought was going to be our ruler for all eternity. _

_ He promised me to keep them safe, but he wouldn’t do it until I agreed to rule with his and help his basically destroy my home. _

_ He promised that he loved me, but used me like I was nothing. _

“Pine Tree, are you okay?” Bill shook me lightly, hands gripping my shoulders.

“Oh, uh, yeah. I’m fine.” Bill gave me a solemn look. He looked deep into my eyes like he could read me like a book, I know he probably knew I was lying and could see my thoughts, but I don’t care, I want him to see. 

Things are starting to click now, they make sense, though I don’t know how to feel about any of this. Part of me wishes I never found out, another is satisfied with the shitty job it’s sloppily completed. What am I even suppose to do now? Keep working with Bill who I may of may not trust at this point? Who’s not to say he’s just using me again?

Do you care because I sure as hell don’t. I turn on my heels and walk straight out of the house. Who cares if my family worries that I left? Who cares if I work in 2 hours? Who cares if Bill is following me with worried questions? I don’t. I keep marching into town, searching for the corner store I’ve become accustomed to for quite some time now. A certain somebody is working behind the counter. Perfect. I go straight to the liquor section and find a bottle of alcohol that seems pleasing, something strong. I don’t even look at the label, I grab a bottle of whiskey and walk up to the counter without hesitation. 

“Whoa, rough day?” the familiar man questions as he scans the bottle. 

“I guess you could say that.” I give a look at Bill.

“That’ll be $23.99” the cashier says blandly. I hand over the cash, Bill giving me a stern look as the man hands me my change.

“Have a nice day.” he says in the same monotone voice.

“You too, Robbie.” and I leave the store, us both pretending what had just happened didn’t happen. 

As I walk down the street, I head straight for the woods, it’s a short cut anyways, but I can also drink without the whole town spreading rumors of that weird Pine’s kid caught chugging some liquor. Bill is still scolding me about how this is a bad idea, but I don’t care. I crack open the bottle and take a long swig once I enter the large pine trees. The cool liquid burns my throat and fills my stomach. I cough a bit, but I like the taste it’s sweet like honey. I read the label and find that I picked up honey whiskey. How funny.

“Dipper.” The nickname that everyone calls me catches me off guard, as Bill is not one to use it. “You need to stop.” His voice is stern, eyebrows furrowed into a furious frown.

“Why should I?” I lake another long gulp of the whiskey.

“Because I don’t need you getting into trouble with your family, what if they find out?” He sounds desperate. How funny.

“Who cares.” I begin to chug the bottle again, proving how callous I am. It’s only a matter of time before the alcohol starts talking, or is it talking already? My stomach aches at the massive amount of fluids I just chugged, but maybe it’s a good thing that the bottle is empty now. I toss it onto the ground without a second thought and continue to venture towards the shack. Maybe if I say I’m sick I can get out of work. Yeah, that’s a good excuse. I let out a hiccup.

“Kid, this is a bad idea.” Bill is paying close attention to my every move. His hands seem tense and ready to catch me if I stumble, isn’t that cute? 

I can see the Shack coming into our line of sight, a tourist leaves the gift shop with her son ,dragging him by the hand as they walk out to a beat up car. Probably a rental. I walk shakily up the steps and hiccup again. 

“Mabel?” I call out. No answer. “Grunkle Stan?” I slur.

“Yeah kid I’m in my office.” I hear faintly from down the hall. I walk down the corridor and peek my head into the crack door.

“Grunkle Stan, I’m not feeling too well, can I take the day off?” My drunken state probably helps seal the deal with how horrendous I sound.

“Geez, yeah sure kid. There’s some medicine in the kitchen.” Stan waves me off and continues to read whatever paper he had been reading before.

I head straight for my room, half expecting to see Bill waiting for me in there. When I do stumble in, there he is waiting just as I had predicted. I giggle a bit, though I don’t know why. 

“Kid, you’re going to hurt yourself.” Bill aids me with closing my door and helps keep me upright as he drags me to the bed.

“Hey Bill, do you wanna fuck?” I say randomly. The alcohol has definitely taken control, not in a I would never say these things kind of way, more like I’m revealing my innermost thoughts that I hide.

“Pine Tree, you’re drunk… “ Since when did an all powerful demon care about the state of his play toy?

“And you care why? I’m giving you sex. Unless you’re a pussy.” I challenge with a smirk. Bill is unamused, but tries to remain calm at my insults.

“Bill is weak, Bill is weak!” I chant over and over again until he is driven mad. He loses his composure, eyes wild with rage as he lets out a frustrated groan.

“Shut the fuck up!” He yells. I immediately fall quiet.

“You want to fuck, fine!” I celebrate a little at my accomplishment. I lay out flat on my bed and begin to pull my clothes off, which seems impossible as I get tangled in the cloth. Bill takes control and undresses me until I’m completely bare.

“Tonight, we play by my rules.” He growls. With a snap of his fingers, ropes appear from thin air and wrap around my arms and legs until I’m confined to the bed. I let out a happy hum. Bill undresses himself and climbs ontop of my, straddling my chest as he forces his way into my mouth with his large erection. I choke a bit as he hits the back of my throat, trusting in and out fast paced. Saliva dribbles out the sides of my mouth as Bill fucks my mouth. 

He pulls away suddenly and takes me into a deep, rough kiss. Another snap of his fingers, though I don’t see anything. Bill gives a devilish grin as he stares down at me, waiting for some type of reaction. I take in a sharp gasp as I feel something enter my hole suddenly, unsure of what it is. 

Bill grabs my shirt and bunches it up into my mouth for me to bite on. When he moves, I can see the tentacle that is sticking out of his back, moving as if it were…  _ oh _ . My eyes grow wide with realization. I don’t notice where he gets it from, but a blindfold is being placed over my eyes. I am left to see nothing but black. All I can do is hear Bill cackling lowly and whispering degrading things into my ear. 

“You like that you dirty slut?” I don’t answer, I continue to breath heavily. A hard slap is smacked across my face.

“I said do you  _ like _ that.” Bill growls inhumanly. I whimper at the contact and quickly muffle a yes through the cloth and nod my head. I feel another slimy appendage wrap around my growing member and begin to slowly stroke it. My back arches as I let out a low moan. Another wraps around my throat, almost depriving me of air, but I can still barely breath. It’s not long before I cum all over my stomach, and no doubt Bill to, my hips jerk and squirm as I climax.

As scary as all of that seemed, for some crazy reason, I enjoyed every second of it. Maybe there really is something wrong with me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since you've made it this far, I would like to clear up any confusion...
> 
> Dipper has done some of the horrible decisions he has done, as he is definitely not stable and has a reoccurring theme to wanting to forget memories he wishes to never see again. 
> 
> And as for Bill, because he may seem out of character at this point, just you wait ;)


	18. What Have I Done?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! Oh boy, I'm kind of sad that this adventure will have to end. For a first fan fic, I'm pretty proud, but maybe I'll go back at some point and fix plot holes and any other errors.  
> I hope y'all enjoy :)

_ Heavy. I feel so heavy. Like gravity is pulling on my body with increasing speed. I can’t really see anything, just glimpses of images that fly by too fast for me to register. I can hear my breath in my ears. The steady thump of a drum is in the background somewhere.  _

_ My breath hitches, though I have no control over it. I hear a diabolical laughter, cackling madly from all around me.  _

_ “Can’t escape. No return.” voices chanted in unison. The words were engraved into my head as I wailed in anguish at the whispering voices.  _

_ “LET ME OUT!” I yell. _

I shot up in a cold sweat, my heart was beating rapidly. Looking over I wasn’t alone in bed. The lanky form of Bill Cipher accompanied me in the space, eyes closed like he was sleeping, but he seemed to tense to be sleeping. Meditating? Yeah, that sounds right. 

Sitting here in the darkness of my room, I feel hollow inside thinking back over the mistakes I have made. Why am I like this? I decide to crawl out of my bed, careful not to disturb the demon next to me. 

The wood creaks beneath my feet, though once I reach tile, the coldness of the ground makes me shudder. I stand in the mirror, looking at myself through groggy eyes. My hair is sticking up in multiple places, which isn’t a rare thing, even the dark bags under my eyes don’t come as a surprise. I rub my arms as a chill runs down my spine. 

Thinking is a dangerous thing, I guess I live on the edge a lot. I think about the memories I thought i once lost, and more come to me even as I stand alone in my bathroom. Those times in school, the mindscape, but what I remember most is the pain.

The pain of thinking you truly love someone, only to be mistaken and taken for granted in the end. Even the physical pain seems to linger in my mind, and I hate myself for somehow longing for that pain again. I hate that I find myself closer and closer to just giving in to Bill’s game and letting him win, if there even is a game. I don’t know what’s worse, giving in to that cruel demon, or ending it all right here right now. 

But I just don’t understand how Bill could suddenly have a change of heart. 

Making that deal earlier this year also comes back to me. I’m mentally hitting myself for even thinking that for one second, forgetting all of it would make it better. I should have just trained harder, worked better, thought smarter, so I could defeat Bill and face my demons; literally and metaphorically. Why is it that I’m so logical after the fact of fucking up? But is anything about me logical?

I grip the porcelain sink until my knuckles are pale. 

He’s probably just using me again, this is all a trick isn’t it? What if all of this isn’t even real? I could be dreaming for all I know! I can’t stand it, I just can’t… not anymore.

I’ve made up mind, for at least this moment, so I take my chance before some part of me decides to talk me out of it. I walk out of the bathroom, walking with purpose as I go in search of the things I need.

I find some rope downstairs in the gift shop as I sneakily creep around to avoid waking anyone up. I through the heavy twine over my shoulder and scurry back to my room. With some paper and pen, I scribbled a note and place it on the floor.

I guess all those years of being taught to camp came in handy. I tie the rope into the one knot I know best, sadly. I try to remain as silent as possible to avoid anyone trying to stop me. No one will hold me back this time. I throw the rope over a beam in the ceiling and ensure it’s sturdy before securing it to the wooden beam. With everything set, I climb onto my chair and place the mechanism around my throat.

One.

“Pine Tree?” A hushed voice calls out.

Two.

“Pine Tree, what are you—wait!”

Three.

∆ ∆ ∆

Dipper’s lifeless body hung from the noose, swinging mockingly at the stunned demon who gazed on with horrified eyes. He noticed a note on the floor, no doubt a suicide note, though Bill’s name never appeared on it. But Bill already knew he was to blame.

Soft footsteps approached the door, but Bill didn't have the willpower to hide anymore, what was the point. His only gateway to world domination was gone. His weapon of mass destruction was now hanging like meat on a stick from the ceiling of his room.

“Dipper, are you o—OH MY GOD!” Mabel screamed in horror to find her brother, though in the most devastating way possible. Tears began to fill up her eyes and fall like a waterfall. Her sorrowful eyes fell on the blond that also filled the room, looking dull as he gazed at her now dead brother. She was suddenly filled with anger at the sudden realization.

“You did this you son of a bitch! I’ll kill you!” She threatened, charging at him like an angry bull. Bill easily deflected the blow she attempted to deliver, sending her stumbling past him. Her screaming voice had awaken the other two men in the house, who came rushing to the room of their hysteric niece.

“Mabel, what’s w—oh Dipper.” Grunkle Ford placed a hand over his open mouth as he stared at his lifeless nephew. He was really gone, for good. The day he dreaded and hoped would never come, had decided to come knocking at his door unexpected. Both Grunkles turned their miserable eyes to the unknown guest in the room.

“Kill him Ford, it’s Bill! Bill Cipher, he did this!” Bill had no words, knowing that her accusations were completely true. Ford was completely caught off guard, not processing all that had just happened. He was sure he had a lead on Bill, he could have sworn he knew the culprit for the destruction of his eternal stone prison. For once in his life, Ford was clueless, too stunned to react. Why was he freezing up. Mabel continued to bawl as she screamed at the demon responsible, Stan soon joined in, though more angry as he landed a few punches on the demon. This fueled the demon to speak his mind.

“If your dumb niece hadn’t brought up Weirdmaggedon to Pine Tree, none of this would have happened. This is all your fault Shooting Star, I was going to make him powerful, he was going to live a long life by my side and you blew it.” Mabel came to a complete stop, as if she had just been stabbed, tears continued to flow down her rosy cheeks. She did this to her brother?

“You better shut your mouth Cipher!” Stan warned as he went in for another punch, but was blocked with ease as the demon was now furious. His eyes glowed a deep shade of crimson as fire sprouted from his hands and licked down his arm.

“I’m tired of your Pine’s getting in my way! The world will come to end one way or another, and you will all pay!” Bill had risen into the air as he declared his vows in a demonic voice. Within seconds, Bill had vanished.

Everyone was silent except for the uneven breathes and occasion sniffles that just couldn’t be contained. Grunkle Ford was the first to move from his spot in the doorway, slowly walking over to Mabel to place caring hands around her as she began to sob harder than before into his chest. Grunkle Stan followed in suit, not caring that everyone would see him cry. Any pride he once had was gone, because in this moment, nothing mattered.

Bill’s failed attempt to steal Dipper away was gone in the wind.

His promise to make them suffer for all their doings didn’t faze them one bit.

Right now, all they could do was mourn for Dipper.

Mourn out of confusion and anger, unsure if they could ever put the pieces together of ever truly know the whole story, but their smart. They know that too. If they think hard enough they could figure it out, but not now. All they can think about is the dull feeling in their chest. They try hard to not accept that there is one less person standing here in the middle of the room. They try even harder not to think about what they will have to do.

Damn that demon and all he stands for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOrrY...  
> Though I'm kinda not >:)   
> So, that's the end! Super sad and not at all a happy ending, oops.


End file.
